There is a 0% chance I will ever return to the NFL

I'd say if it was from zero to 100, 100 being yes, I thought about it, zero being I didn't think about it, I'd say anywhere into the negative 100,000.

There is a 100% chance I am doing some sort of fantasy football or pick-em game this year

there's 100% chance I'm doing some sort of fantasy or pick-em or some fun game. I've got to do something, right?

Barry Sanders is still capable of an NFL comeback

My last one is more of a hypothetical comeback because it hasn't happened yet... Barry Sanders, always going to come back. A lot of rumors ever since he retired. I still think he could go out there and do it. I think he could.

The Detroit Pistons are moving in the right direction despite their Game 7 loss

The progression of the Pistons along the way is like, what were they, two years ago? They won like 16 or 18 games. They were so bad. Last year they had competitive series against The Knicks. Then this year, the natural progression from that is, let's take the regular season super seriously. Let's win all the games that we can get a high seed... I would say the totality of this season, we're still going the right direction in Detroit.

I will renounce my American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup

I will renounce American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup this year... I'll probably need somebody to come and hang out with me and... the south of France is nice.

Patrick Reed is the first PAWG in the history of professional golf.

Patrick Reed, let me tell you, I think he might be the first PAWG golfer. He is. He's thick as hell. Like he was filling out. He also wears... the tight pants... he looks like early era Meghan Trainor... He bends over. He's like, ooh.