Takes

Russell Wilson is definitely a Hall of Famer

Russell Wilson will be a Hall of Famer. Yes, he's a Hall of Famer.

Human civilization is highly likely to end by the year 2050

So good old science came out with a report today, and it said that it's highly likely that human civilization will end in 2050.

Humanity is fundamentally 'fucked' and there is no saving us

We are a staunchly we are fucked podcast because we are fucked. We want to fuck humanity. Recycle all of humanity.

The Chargers will never win a Super Bowl in their Baby Blue jerseys

They're never going to win a Super Bowl in the Baby Blues, but it looks great. I'm done believing in the San Diego Chargers.

All porn history will be public knowledge within 10 years

I'm very long woke on the fact that eventually all of our porn history is going to come out. Within 10 years, you're going to know what kind of porn your president watches.

The world will be completely over in 150 years

I am 100% one of those people now that thinks the world's going to be done in 150 years. ... People who are saying we'll figure it out, it's too late. We have not figured it out.

The world will be over in 15 years

I think take away the zero [from 150 years]. Oh, 15. ... [The world's] done.

Bill O'Brien is a bad coach who will never win a Super Bowl

Bill O'Brien's a bad coach and no way he's going to win a Super Bowl. Yeah, exactly. No way he's going to win a Super Bowl.

The US will win the World Cup in 25 years because Cristiano Ronaldo's son is an American citizen

Cristiano Ronaldo's son is now playing for Juventus under nine. And he was born in San Diego, so he's an American citizen. He's like the Johnny Appleseed for the future of U.S. soccer. We just need Cristiano Ronaldo to impregnate just as many women as possible... in America.

Legalized gambling will eventually end the relationship with personal bookies

My first hot seat is your bookie... gambling is legal. I don't think anyone's going to lose their bookie overnight. I think it's going to be probably like a decade, but at some point the bookie relationship will be something of the past. And that's very sad.

Kyle Schwarber is going to be a Hall of Famer

That's me with Kyle Schwarber. He's going to be a Hall of Famer. I've said it before. And this is the first step.

Pigeons will eventually be the only birds left on Earth

The world is going to end up in a place where the pigeons are the king birds and they're the only birds left. It's going to be in like 100 years, it will just be birds are just pigeons.

If one nuclear bomb is launched, the whole world will blow up in a chain reaction

North Korea is developing nukes, and my theory is once one of those... So I've always thought once one nuclear bomb goes in the air, then... All the other countries and worlds are going to let them off, and then the whole world's going to blow up.

Lacrosse will be a top-tier major sport within 10 to 15 years

Cool throne lacrosse. I might have been in two. I've been a little early. I said there's 30 years. It's looking more like 10 to 15... I mean, it's like the hottest thing. It's like number one thing on SportsCenter.