Takes

Russell Wilson's trade to the Broncos is a bigger story than Aaron Rodgers staying in Green Bay

I think Russell Wilson is the bigger story. Russell Wilson is definitely the bigger story because [Aaron] Rogers staying in at the Packers was kind of expected. Ish. Russell Wilson go to the Broncos is like, whoa.

The AFC West is the best division in football with the addition of Russell Wilson

I've seen more of people saying like, look how stack this division is. I agree. And Derek Carr is like, Def actually is probably the biggest God division and football right now.

Coach K is the best coach I ever played for across all levels

He's the best coach I ever played for high school. AAU college, six, six coaches in the pros, I think. Yeah, he was the best coach I played. He was the best coach I played for.

Kevin Durant is also a basketball genius because of his obsession with the game

Yeah, he is. He is. A lot of guys that are basketball geniuses... they are obsessed with basketball and they watch basketball... I think [Durant] out of anyone in the NBA right now, I think he loves basketball more than anyone.

The Phoenix Suns will win the Western Conference

Who's winning the West... Phoenix. Phoenix is... Phoenix, Phoenix. There's I, there's more wild cards to me in the East and there aren't in the West.

Alcohol is a diuretic because it flushes liquid out of your body faster than you can hydrate

Al calls a diuretic. And why it dehydrates you is because it flushes all the liquid in your body, out through your piss. So even though it may seem like it's hydrated... It gets all your liquid out faster.

The era of larger-than-life legendary college basketball coaches is dying

We're going to lose... an era because when Jim Boeheim goes out to pasture, Rick Pitino, who knows where he's going to go next, Cal... the era of these college coaches that are bigger than life, it feels like they're dying. The guys we have right now are not old school legends... they're not like these Titans that feel like hovering over it.

Once you mentally transition into wearing shorts for the spring, you can never go back to pants

Once I mentally transitioned into shorts, I just don't go back. And so I'll get caught with like wearing these shorts when it's freezing outside, looking like a fool... but I can't go back and officially made the mental transition. I'm a short, skinny.

People lie because they are afraid of the negative reaction to the truth

The thing I struggle with... people that lie a lot, they lie because of the reaction that they were getting, when they would get in trouble. It's like almost a defense mechanism. Right? I created a paradigm within which [my daughter] was not allowed to grow and learn because she was going to fuck up again. But now she was so scared of watching me fly off the handle... that I taught her. The new thing is to lie.

Jim Boeheim is 100% coaching at Syracuse next year

I asked a quiz question to the, to, to everyone in the car... how many years do you think Jim Boeheim has been at Syracuse? ...He's been at Syracuse for 46 years and he's still not retiring... he's coaching next year. One a hundred percent. Yeah.

Russell Wilson will be the starting quarterback for the Seahawks in 2022

Russell Wilson is the starting quarterback for the Seahawks to start the season. I would, I would think that that would be the case.

Madison Airport (MSN) is an 8.6 out of 10

Final ratings... I'm going to say now this is obviously on a curve because the regional airport... I love how small and quaint it is. I'm going to give it an eight on eight and a half. ...PFT: 9.1... Hank: 8.1... Let's say 8.6 for the people. 8.6. It's a pretty good rating.

Wisconsin will probably be a two-seed in the NCAA tournament

now we're sitting here in the call center and they're a two seed, probably a two seed. At least I don't want him to be a one seat. That's too much pressure.

A lion would beat a jaguar in a fight

I feel like a lion, right? King of the jungle? Yeah. They're way bigger.

English literature majors can graduate college without attending in-person classes

Problem is now that I have actually have in-person classes, I just don't go because I'm too used to smoking weed and playing video games. So I was just wondering if I can graduate without going to class for the rest of my college career... Yeah, you sure can. It's called being an English major.

To graduate college, you either have to read the book or go to class—you don't have to do both

the tip I always give is I would either read the book or go to class one or the other, you pick one or the other and you'll be fine. I would either go like, if I didn't want to read the book, I'd go to every single class. If I didn't feel like going to class, I'd read every single book on the list because they basically give you all the answers in college.

Tommy Tanks is the main attraction of college baseball

Tommy Tanks he's on NC state. I believe it's seven home runs in his first nine... he's kind of the main story, the main attraction of college baseball this year with no [MLB] baseball going on, it's getting even more heightened coverage.

Prime Cam Newton is the ultimate choice for a team of 11 clones

Prime Cam Newton without a doubt would be [the choice]. I'm switching mine to prime Cam Newton... think about how big and strong and fast he is and can throw. He would have the one thing prime [would need].

By the end of the year, Cost Plus Drugs will carry 2,000 generic medications

Right now we've got about 110 different generics at costplusdrugs.com. By the end of the year we'll have 2,000. So if you have any type of prescription, check it out, you know, if we have your drug, we will save [you money].

Aaron Rodgers will never leave the Packers because the NFC North is too easy

He probably did the Panchakarma cleanse and was like, wait, I played the Vikings, the lions and the bears. Why would I leave that? Like you get kick our ass... I think he, he, he clearly wants back with his ex.

The Winter Olympics ratings decline is due to a lack of NHL pros in hockey

The average total audience was 11.4 million viewers for the 2022. And that's a sharp decline... I'm convinced it's the hockey like it's, it's it's hockey, not having the pros and not having it as like a tentpole.

The best sideline reporting happens when I act as a 'spy' for the broadcast

I like to think I'm a spy on the field... get a camera to Aaron Donald, he's just going off on the sideline... or Antonio Brown kind of, you know, doing something with his leg... The important thing is... the shit you don't hear from me, but I can get the camera and tell our producer and director. I love it. I got off on it.

Producing live events with athletes is like 'corralling cats'

I have a producer in my ear yelling at me... I have a little bit of a like corralling cats and kindergarten teacher. Like, you need to sit down, you need to be quiet... I'm trying to keep this live event moving and mind you there's like alcohol involved.

Tom Brady's conference calls are unbelievable

Brady's conference calls with us were un-fucking-believable. I will miss those so much. He did a lot on them, which I thought was great.

Brian Kelly is a winner and will have an awesome staff at LSU

Brian Kelly wins everywhere he goes... I think Kelly's a winner. And I think he's going to have an awesome staff. I think there's always a little hesitancy when you're from there [the South]... but he's a winner.

Best man speeches must be five minutes or less

I think you have to keep it like five minutes or less. I think anyone who goes longer than that is... it's three to five minutes.

I was fined $10,000 for jokingly saying I checked my phone at halftime

I jokingly said I checked my phone at halftime of the Baltimore game and it NFL took it as a real saying and find me $10,000. Why aren't you allowed [to have a phone]? It's just one of those things where, yeah. I'm not allowed to have my phone on me at all 90 minutes before the game or during halftime.

The Rams were definitively the best team in the NFL this season

I'm walking away from this season Not being like, oh man, it feels like the best team didn't win. All the Rams were the best team. Like, let's just say the Rams are the best team, the best team in the NFL this year, they played like a complete, you know, they had some moments where they were down... they righted the ship.

The BMW 'Electric Avenue' was one of the three best commercials of Super Bowl 56

For me, the cars dominated this year's broadcast. One of them, obviously I have to award it to the electric avenue, BMW commercial for Zeus and the other. I like the Austin Powers one.

The halftime show was specifically designed for people aged 30 to 45

They basically were like, let's do a halftime show where anyone between the age of like 30 and 45 is going to be like, this is the greatest halftime show ever. And it, it worked. Cause I was like, they played every hit from like every portion of our lives.

The Cincinnati Bengals will defeat the Los Angeles Rams 24-20

I still think it's going to be like 24-20 Cincinnati... I'm reverting back fully to what I felt on Monday morning and I'm going to stick with the Bengals.

Joe Burrow will have over 36.5 pass attempts in the Super Bowl

My prop is Joe Burrow, over 36 and a half pass attempts... four out of the last five games he's hit over that number. I think it'll be a lot of quick passes... for the Bengals to win, Joe Burrow has to pass the ball 40 times.

The 76ers are a legitimate title threat with the addition of James Harden

I still think [Ben Simmons] is talented... but yeah, I mean, if you put Ben Simmons with Kyrie Irving and Kevin Durant, those guys are so fucking good. I still think, I saw it and I was like, Ooh, that's pretty good for both teams. I think the Sixers become a real, real threat now.

My field goal range is up to 75 yards in practice

75 yards. [In college]. I don't know if [Zac Taylor] would let me try 70, but it would have to be the right conditions for sure. I don't know if 70 is the right number, maybe 67 to break the record.

The Rams will beat the Bengals 24-21 in the Super Bowl

I'm going to say Rams 24, Bengals 21. [I don't know the spread]. I'm not a bettor like you guys.

I could easily run a 5k in under 30 minutes if I actually trained

If I trained, which I won't, I could be under 30 easy. No problem. My pace was already 4:30... 34 minutes, I didn't stop. I just fucking powered through.

Chargers fans are the 'Yacht Rock' of NFL fanbases

Chargers fans are like the yacht rock of fans. You go to that stadium? No one's in like boots, like ready to fight. No, one's like, it's like, everyone's in flip-flops everyone's high... It's literally, it's the yacht rock of NFL teams. It's such a pleasant experience. Charger fans and I it's just like, it's like a Michael McDonald song. It's just like, it's smooth, man. It's smooth.

We are officially boycotting the Olympics

I was back in the week as the Olympics... we're boycotting. Except the women's hockey, the women's hockey team we're supporting because they're friends of ours and we coach them. But we're boycott.

Five years is the official amount of time for a meme to become funny again

It's the perfect time for it to come full circle. Cause we've, we've predicted, we've had this conversation off air many times. Like when do you think Harambe jokes are going to be funny again? I think five years is now officially the amount of time when something can become fun again.

Athletes only get into fights at 'nightclubs,' never at 'bars'

Have you ever noticed that when it's an athlete getting into a bar fight, it's always a nightclub. Yeah. And it's never like, they never just say like at a bar it's like at, at a local nightclub establishment.

Bert 'Be Home' Blyleven is my best nickname ever

Bert Blyleven cause that's 'Be Home' Blyleven. Because you don't have to see... a kid and you heard from your parents 'be home by 11.' And as a parent you've told your kid 'be home by 11.' You don't have to be a genius to figure these out. That's probably the best.

The Rolling Stones are the greatest rock band of all time

If you're asking me a rock and roll honest question would have to be the [Rolling] Stones. I just think I would, because they're still doing it. And the songs from the sixties, they still could come out today. They they're, you know, 'Under My Thumb'...

I am on the same career track as Ryan Fitzpatrick

I can see myself, kind of like him [Ryan Fitzpatrick], kind of the same ride, everything... Throughout his career, he just jumped from place to place and was back up and then kind of thrown in and back up and thrown in. And I feel like I'm kind of on that track, hopefully on that track.

No starting quarterback will ever touch Tom Brady's record of seven Super Bowl wins

Seven Super Bowls will not — I'm going to safely — I really do not think that will be touched by a starting quarterback.

The MLB season will inevitably be delayed due to lack of progress in labor meetings

The MLB and the Major League Baseball Players Association made little progress in their latest meeting, and a delay to the upcoming season feels inevitable.

37 is the saddest birthday for an adult

I'm comfortable in 37. I'm old I'm washed. Who cares? 37 is in terms of the birthday scale. It ranks at the very bottom. The saddest birthday, really nothing burns.

Harambe is officially back as a cultural force due to the Bengals' Super Bowl run

My who's back of the week is our sweet prince Heran bay. We obviously were very early on it in 2016... with the Bengals making this run, then being from Cincinnati it's of naturally happened... it went Facebook, super nuclear viral... it's back.

Emily in Paris is a genius show despite being terrible

Emily in Paris is the worst show ever by the way, never watched it... it is mind-numbingly bad, but it's one of those shows that's so bad. It sucks you in... It's a genius show. It's a genius show and it's terrible. But it's genius.

Patrick Mahomes is the clear #1 young quarterback with no debate

If I had to rank these guys, Patrick Mahomes, number one, easy, easy. It's not even a debate. Patrick Mahomes... you gotta go win the Super Bowl and you gotta go do what he's done consistently year after year.

The Rams are the first team ever to play a Super Bowl in their own home stadium

This could be the first Superbowl ever slayed by a team in its own home stadium. It's the Rams. Make it to the Superbowl. It's never been done before.