Takes

The Colts are frauds who choked their game against the Chiefs

If you're not a fraud, this is a game you win. [The Colts] are frauds. That was their game to lose and they choked.

Jahmyr Gibbs is the best running back in the NFL

I think I'm fine with just saying Jahmyr Gibbs is the best running back because when he gets into open field, there's just no—he looks like he's making other NFL players look slow.

Jameis Winston is a starting quarterback in this league

This should prove that Jameis Winston should be a starting quarterback in the NFL. There are so many bad games that we watch and bad quarterback play that we watch. Jameis Winston is not. Yes, sometimes he throws interceptions. Yes, sometimes he makes mistakes. He is so much fun.

The Bears can compete with anyone in the NFL right now

I also think the Bears can compete with anyone at this point. And they've got a belief that they are not gonna blink when those tough moments come.

Jaxon Smith-Njigba is the best wide receiver in the NFL this season

I have been saying Jaxon Smith-Njigba has been the best wide receiver this season for a month and it is facts. He's incredible... He's on pace to break an NFL record of 2,029 yards.

Miles Garrett should be the NFL MVP if he breaks the all-time sack record

Miles Garrett should be the MVP if he breaks the all-time sacks record, which it looks like he's on pace to break/smash/shatter... If Miles Garrett does all this on the Browns, that's equivalent to Lawrence Taylor doing it on crack.

The Raiders are the worst team in the NFL

I think the Raiders are the worst team in the NFL. Their two wins are against the Titans and the Patriots. They have lost—they won against the Patriots week one. They've had one win since.

The Rams are currently the best team in the NFL

The Rams are the best TEAM IN THE NFL. Does anyone disagree? I don't know who would make the case for any other team right now. They're just destroying people.

Matthew Stafford is the NFL MVP right now

Matthew Stafford's the MVP of the league right now. What is the current odds on DraftKings? ... [He] makes football look easy.

Wisconsin is the hottest team in college football right now

Wisconsin's hottest team in the country. Two back. They've won two home games against ranked opponents in November. Pretty cool.

The Pirates leaking interest in Kyle Schwarber is just 'red meat' to appease the fans with no intent to sign him

I feel like the Pirates' version of them actually signing a big free agent would be just leaking it that they're thinking about signing. Correct. That was... their red meat to the fan base. Be like, look, we tried.

The Vikings should cut and immediately re-sign J.J. McCarthy so he can be a reclamation project

What the Vikings really should do is cut JJ McCarthy. Yep. So he's a bust and then sign him back. So he is a reclamation project. Then it'll be good. Cut JJ McCarthy, officially declaring a bust, sign McCarthy former draft bust and have KOC fix him. Smart.

The Bears are still a year away from being real contenders

I'm a little more realistic because I look at the schedule and see, you know, that they really have what—they played one team with a winning record and lost to 'em. I'm a little apprehensive... I just don't think this is their year. I think they're a year away.

Ben Johnson's 'psychopath' leadership is exactly what the Bears needed to change their culture

Everything this guy [Ben Johnson] does is so insane that it's authentic... next door neighbors to insanity. But the good kind of neighbor to insanity... in order to get that stench out of the building... you need a psychopath dude. And they've got one.

Greg Olsen's Pop Warner team has a more complex offense than the Philadelphia Eagles

Greg Olson's got more routes in his offense with Luke Kuechly [on their Pop Warner team] than in that Pop Warner League... than the Eagles offense. I can promise you that. The route tree is primitive. People say it looks like a high school offense at times.

Sam Darnold will eventually revert to his old, mistake-prone self because 'you are what you are'

Usually this league you are what you are. You're gonna have moments where you're up here... and moments when you're down here... eventually you're in the middle and that's who you are... [Sam Darnold] looked frazzled [last week] and that can't happen. It just can't happen in the big games... there's a Sam Darnold problem at least in my mind.

The CFP committee is intentionally suppressing JMU in favor of the AAC winner

I think that what is happening right now is they had their heart set on the American [AAC], on that conference. Whoever wins that conference is going to get just pigeonholed in. Doesn't matter what else happens.

Georgia is in the best possible position because they can get a playoff bye without playing the SEC championship game

The winner number one is Georgia, because Georgia obviously beats Texas. They get to four. Georgia's in that perfect spot where they could potentially not go to the SEC championship game and have a buy. Which that's gotta be the greatest spot you could ever be in.

Duke is a bad football team and I am done considering them in any ACC or playoff scenarios

Duke is not gonna win out. I'm done with Duke. ... Duke is bad. I'm done with Duke. I'm done with Duke in any scenarios. ... They're five and five. They're, they're not a good team.

It should be illegal for the NFL to put the Raiders in primetime

It should be against the law to put the Raiders on primetime television. ... There should be a blacklist of teams that at this point... the fans should be able to vote on which teams should no longer be considered for primetime.

NFL teams should be required to win at least four games to receive their first-round draft pick

Dumb rule: teams should have to win four games to get their first pick. So at the end of the season, a Raiders Monday Night Football game has actual consequences where it's like they need to desperately win this game to get their allotted first-round pick.

James Franklin is leaving a $50 million buyout because he has a competitive drive to coach, not just for the money

I feel like you don't get to a point where you are successful enough to get a $50 million buyout unless you have that like killer instinct, competitive drive. ... James Franklin's going after being an awesome coach, coaching, he needs football to live.

The Los Angeles Rams are the most trustworthy team in the NFL right now

If you force me to pick one, I'd probably say the Rams. Matthew Stafford is playing at an MVP level. The defense is young, it's outstanding. ... I clearly trust the Rams more than anybody. I think they've been the most consistent team so far.

The quarterbacks for Jacksonville, Miami, Philadelphia, and Arizona are the highest-paid players on their teams but are not the best players

Jacksonville, Miami, Philadelphia, Arizona—you know what those four teams have in common? The quarterback is the highest paid player on the team, but he's not the best player. ... when you have that dynamic... there's always something when the guy making the most money is not the best player.

Jaxson Dart is risking his career and long-term brain health by continuing to run given his history of concussions

Jaxson Dart has to realize, man, how many running quarterbacks are alive to be like 10-year running quarterbacks? ... The shelf life doesn't last long. He's gotta modify his running style. He's been in concussion protocol four times. That's not good. ... His brain will be jelly by the time he's in year three. He just can't do that.

Pat Fitzgerald is the absolute best fit to be the next head coach at Penn State

Pat Fitzgerald. One blank. Agree. If the Penn State people can get past allegedly what happened at Northwestern... doesn't it make a lot of sense? ... I was ready to go outside and head to the Northeast and just get cold and frozen and play for Pat Fitzgerald.

College football coaches should never play more than 20 rounds of golf per year

You should not golf during the season whatsoever at all. August to January, no golf. Once the season is over... if your coach is playing more than 20 rounds a year, then you got the wrong coach.

Oklahoma is limited offensively because they cannot run the ball and rely too heavily on John Mateer

When you go against the best teams, your flaws show. And the defense was outstanding [against Alabama]... but if you look at the offense, Alabama outgained them two to one. ... They're limited offensively and so much is put on the quarterback [John Mateer]. ... I don't know who they would play where I would favor them because they're limited offensively.

The Bears could be a dangerous team if they get healthy and play a complete game in all three phases

They have won seven games already this year and they haven't really put together... a great game on all three phases. And if that happens, especially if we get some of our secondary healthy, like this team could be better than we think.

The best way to surprise a girl with a proposal is to do a fake one at a sports game first

The surprise is already over because you already are planning it. ... The only way he could truly surprise you is doing it at a sports game... center court at a mid-tier college basketball game. ... He does a fake proposal to you at a sports game and then he's like 'piss you off! Just kidding!'

The Commanders are one of the worst teams in the league

I think the Commanders are one of the worst teams in the league. We just lost to the Dolphins... the offense is trash, the defense is also very, very, very bad.

I am not concerned about the Buccaneers; they will still win the NFC South.

I am not super concerned about the [Bucs]. I still think they're gonna win that division. I know the Panthers are breathing down their neck... As long as the Panthers don't get favored anymore games... I'll be okay with that.

I am not worried about the Panthers catching the Bucs in the NFC South

I'm not worried about the Panthers... Somebody's gotta win the South. It's not exactly the most competitive division. So hopefully we can go ahead and lock that down.

I officially trust the Rams with my life.

I think the Rams, I think the Rams definitely [are] one of those teams now [that I trust with my life].

The Bears have officially graduated to being a good team

I do officially think we've graduated to good. We're obviously not great, but we're good for right now. Seven and three. You can't deny that they just find ways to win games.

Raheem Morris is on the hot seat after five straight losses

I think that I've been hesitant to say Raheem Morris is on the hot seat. He's on the hot seat now. This is five in a row that the Falcons have lost.

We are officially done with the Bengals for the 2025 season

Can we be done with the Bengals? ... They're not making the playoffs. Joe Burrow, don't rush back. We're done. I think Bengals fans would agree. We're done with the Bengals this year.

The Texans have a Super Bowl caliber defense.

I think that the defense is, they, they have a Super Bowl caliber defense. Yeah, for sure.

The Jaguars loss wounded Jim Harbaugh's soul and is likely the worst loss of his career.

I think this is going to be a game where if you, if we have Jim Harbaugh on in 10 years and we're like, 'what's the worst loss you ever had?' he might say this game because the Jaguars outmanned and out-physicaled and were more violent and just played Jim Harbaugh football right down his throat... I think this loss wounded Jim Harbaugh's soul.

The Rams are a Super Bowl championship level team

I think the Rams are Super Bowl championship level team. 'Cause their defense is also elite... the Rams to me are the best team in the NFC right now.

The Seahawks defense is Super Bowl caliber.

The Seahawks defense is elite... I think the Seahawks defense is Super Bowl caliber defense.

Aaron Rodgers is not very good anymore

I don't think Rodgers is very good anymore. Aaron Rodgers has not been playing elite football. The offense does not look explosive at all.

1992 to 1993 was the greatest run of movies ever

The 1992 to 1993, like the greatest run of movies ever. The Fugitive, Jurassic Park, all those. Best year of movies.

No one wants to play the Chiefs in the playoffs.

If they get there, no one wants to [play them]. Like no troll. Like no one wants to play [Mahomes]. No... Whenever you think they're down, that's when it's, when they come back.

The Eagles are the most easily bullied team in the NFL

The Eagles are the number one can-be-bullied team. It definitely felt like that... they are a tough watch right now, but it works.

Nick Sirianni is allowed to make questionable decisions because he is a winner

Nick Sirianni is the winningest coach in the NFL right now... I think that Nick Sirianni is allowed to make decisions and shouldn't be scrutinized for every single thing that he's done when he just keeps winning football games.

The Eagles defensive line is elite.

Defense is insane. The Eagles defensive line is so fucking good... Jalen Phillips has completely changed this defense.

The Barstool Internet Invitational was the best piece of sports entertainment ever on YouTube.

I do actually think that that was the best piece of sports entertainment I've ever watched on YouTube. In the YouTube video format. It was the final round had like so many twists and turns in it. It had a lot of emotions.

Justin Fields is not a viable starting quarterback in the NFL

Until you have [Justin Fields] on your team, you can't fully, in theory, he's got everything. But then you watch him and you're like, okay, there's something. It's just, it's just not there the way it needs to be for a starter in the NFL.

Mike Elco is an unbelievable coach and a perfect fit for the Texas A&M job

Texas A&M [is one of the best teams]... they won the press conference with Jimbo Fisher, and then they got a guy, Mike Elco, whoever's like, oh, what dude? Yeah. Okay. He's an unbelievable coach. Not only that, he's a great fit at Texas A&M and understands it.