PMT DB
PMT DB
Braxton Berrios on All-Pro Honors, Jets Free Agency, and the 'Cocaine' Play
Super Wildcard Weekend wrapped up with a whimper as the Rams absolutely dismantled the Arizona Cardinals. Big Cat and PFT are officially calling it: the Cardinals are who we thought they were. After months of watching Kliff Kingsbury teams fade down the stretch, the wheels finally fell off on the biggest stage.
Big CatThe Arizona Cardinals are frauds
The Arizona Cardinals are frauds, absolute frauds. I've been... this podcast has been forefront in the Arizona Cardinals are frauds for the better half of two months now. Kliff Kingsbury fades down the stretch. Kyler Murray... they just don't, they're just not an upper echelon football team.
Kyler Murray looked like he was playing in slow motion, or perhaps he was just exhausted from blocking everyone on Twitter after the game. PFT noticed a physical change in the former Heisman winner during the blowout loss.
PFT CommenterKyler Murray has gotten slower, softer, and shorter
Kyler Murray has gotten slower, softer, and shorter... he was getting chased down from behind by guys that were about 150 pounds heavier than him on a regular basis.
It was such a lopsided affair that the guys weren't even worried about Matthew Stafford doing his usual Stafford things. Usually, a one-score lead in the first half is enough to make any Stafford bettor sweat, but Big Cat knew early on that this one was over.
Big CatThe Cardinals were so bad that Matthew Stafford couldn't screw the game up
The Cardinals are so bad tonight, not even Matthew Stafford can fuck this up... It got so like, I'm not even saying when it was whatever it was, the score was a, what? 21 was the 28. Nothing yet. I'm not even saying then I'm saying when it was 14, nothing. I was like, the Cardinals are so bad that Matthew Stafford cannot screw this up.
## Fixing the Cardinals and Cowboys The fallout from the weekend has both Big Cat and PFT looking for coaching changes. While Mike McCarthy is catching heat for his clock management, Kliff Kingsbury is being scrutinized for his inability to adapt. The solution for both teams might be sitting right on their own sidelines.
Big CatIf I were a Cardinals or Cowboys fan, I would prefer my defensive coordinator to be the head coach
I would be more confident if I were a Cardinals or Cowboys fan, if our, if our defensive coordinator was the head coach and not [the current ones].
PFT CommenterThe Cardinals should hire a defensive mastermind like Dan Quinn or Vic Fangio
I think that this is the type of team that you do the thing where you hire a Vic Fangio where you go with a defensive coordinator has been great. Yeah. You hire a defensive guy. You Zig while everybody else zags... I think as long as you have an average offensive coordinator, if you have like a defensive mastermind leading that team, I think that's the way that you got to go. You hire somebody that maybe you hire Dan Quinn.
If the Cardinals do decide to move on from Kliff, Big Cat has a perfect destination for the offensive guru. It involves a specific pairing in the Mile High city where the coaching duties would be, let's say, light.
Big CatKliff Kingsbury should coach Aaron Rodgers in Denver because he wouldn't actually have to coach
He [Kliff Kingsbury] needs to do Rodgers to Denver, cliff, to Denver. He needs to coach Aaron Rodgers where he doesn't really have to coach. Yeah. That would be a good fit for them.
## Darren Rovell's Hall of Fame Self-Own In what might be the funniest 24-hour stretch in the history of the internet, Darren Rovell decided to celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. Day by showing off his collection of memorabilia, including a jailhouse log signed by MLK. When the internet predictably reacted with horror, Rovell doubled down, claiming he couldn't be racist because some of his favorite items are black.
Big CatDarren Rovell owns MLK and black history memorabilia just to turn a profit later
You own a piece of history that shows like when Martin Luther king was in jail... and you owned it to turn a profit one day, because that's what he does with all of his memorabilia.
Despite the cringe, PFT finds himself rooting for Rovell to stay exactly who he is. There is a certain level of unintentional comedy that only Rovell can provide, especially when he's hopping into Miami Hurricanes Twitter Spaces to defend his "love of black history."
PFT CommenterDarren Rovell is a net positive on society because of his unintentional comedy
I actually just like watching this all unfold. I think his, I think he actually is a net positive on society just because of how terribly out of touch and insanely hilarious his unintentional comedy is... He gets dunked on for sport at this time.
## Braxton Berrios In-Studio All-Pro return man and impending free agent Braxton Berrios joined the show to talk about his breakout season with the Jets and what he's looking for in his next contract. He broke down the terrifying reality of being a return specialist, noting that while kickoffs have higher speeds, punt returns offer a different kind of fear.
Braxton BerriosPunt returns are scarier than kickoff returns in the NFL
I will wholeheartedly say punt return is scarier than kickoff return, but you will get hit hard on kickoff return because they're running from 60 yards... it's a full-on head-on collision.
As a Miami legend, Berrios also gave his honest assessment of where the Hurricanes stand under Mario Cristobal. While the hype is building, he’s not ready to say the 'U' is fully back yet. He even suggested some new ground rules for the infamous turnover chain to keep it from looking silly during losses.
Braxton BerriosMiami Hurricanes football is currently only a 3 out of 10 for being 'back'
I think Mario Cristobal is the right guy... but right now we're like at a three, three out of 10. You know, like we have the U on our helmet, we have the turnover chain and like, that's about it.
Braxton BerriosThe Miami turnover chain should not be used if the team is losing by more than 14 points
I think we should have a rule. Like if we're losing more than like 14 points, the term chain doesn't [come out]. No props.
Berrios also touched on the "Cocaine" play—the perfectly executed downfield lateral from the Jets' season. PFT has long been an advocate for more laterals in the NFL, but Berrios explained that the secret sauce is using them when the defense least expects it, rather than as a last-second prayer.
Braxton BerriosPlanned downfield laterals like the 'Cocaine' play only work if they aren't used in desperation
It's great when teams run it when it's not a desperation situation, because if it's desperation, the other team sees it coming a mile away. Absolutely. And they're able to defend it... We had that one in the playbook actually for a few weeks and... it worked phenomenally.
With free agency looming, Big Cat and PFT tried to get Berrios to reveal his preferred destination. While he wouldn't name a team, he did reveal the three most important factors in his decision-making process, and it’s bad news for teams in high-tax, landlocked, cold-weather cities.
Braxton BerriosNo state income tax is the most important factor in NFL free agency
No state income tax. Okay. All right. Then I would say beach and then brutally cold... I'm indifferent to the division, but no state income tax [is most important].
## Hot Seat/Cool Throne Andy Reid is on the Cool Throne after using a chocolate cake analogy to describe his team's hunger for another Super Bowl. It’s a terrifying prospect for the rest of the league because a hungry Andy Reid is a dangerous Andy Reid.
PFT CommenterAndy Reid's food metaphors mean the entire NFL is in trouble
Andy Reed really put cake on the hot seat... He just thinks of everything his life as it's related to food. Once he starts thinking about food, he physically gets hungry and then he's going to mentally get hungry. And then the entire NFL, next thing he knows in trouble.
LeBron James is on the Hot Seat for his role as the league's premier coach killer. With Frank Vogel reportedly on a game-to-game basis with the Lakers, LeBron is back to his old tricks of evaluating his bench boss with a gladiator-style thumbs up or thumbs down after every whistle.
Big CatLeBron James is the ultimate coach killer
LeBron and the coach killers back. It looks like Frank Vogel might get fired. There's a lot of rumors right now. No one does it better than him. No one kills a coach better than LeBron... Bron is going to come off the court and just be like, all right, he keeps his job one more game. Give him a look like, yeah, he's just doing the fucking gladiator up and down after every game for Frank Vogel's life.
Finally, Billy Football brought some "breaking news" to the table regarding the rollout of 5G technology and its potential to ruin everyone's travel plans. While the guys were skeptical, Billy remained convinced that the skies are about to get very quiet.
Billy Football5G radars will ground all US air travel
Turns out a bunch of the airline CEOs said that the new 5G radars that are getting put on for telecommunications, once they get turned on, it's going to affect a bunch of their planes landing. And that they're going to have to ground all US air travel tomorrow.
If the 5G doesn't ground the planes, maybe the Michael Jackson impersonator who choked out an Eagles fan in Vegas can step in to keep the peace.
