PMT DB
PMT DB
Captain Sig Hansen on Heart Attacks and Hornswoggle's R&R Debut
The NFL Draft is still a week away, and PFT and Big Cat are feeling the fatigue of the endless news cycle. To fill the void, we're getting stories about Justin Fields' medical history and Nick Sirianni playing rock-paper-scissors to evaluate prospects. Big Cat is already out on the new Eagles coach for trying too hard to look like a visionary.
Big CatI am skeptical of Nick Sirianni because he self-leaked the rock-paper-scissors draft story.
He put the news out there that he was evaluating draft prospects by asking them to play rock, paper, scissors against them... I would have liked this story if someone else had reported it... but the fact that he put it out there, he's like, look at this cool, smart, awesome football guy thing that I did... I'm officially skeptical of Nick Sirianni at this point.
PFT has a theory that the league is just spacing out the drama to keep the junkies fed during the home stretch.
PFT CommenterThe NFL stashed the Justin Fields epilepsy story to drop it during a slow news week before the draft
If the draft wasn't pushed back this far, we might never have found out about it... They're like, hey, the week before, let's drop the epilepsy story. We're going to stash that one away because people are going to be starved for some news.
The Baddest Man on the Bering Sea
Captain Sig Hansen joined the show and immediately solidified his status as one of the toughest human beings to ever sit for an interview. The guys talked about the sheer isolation of crab fishing and the psychological toll of being on a boat for months at a time. Sig revealed that he actually survived two heart attacks while working, basically trying to ignore them until his crew and the production team forced him to get help.
He also shared some wild stories about the law of the sea, including a time his buddy had to duct-tape a crew member to a bunk because he started sleeping with a knife and threatening the rest of the ship. When PFT asked about the tradition of calling boats "she" and "her," Sig admitted it's just the way it's been for hundreds of years, though he's waiting for the day he gets canceled for not using a boat's preferred pronouns.
Hornswoggle is Ready for War
WWE superstar Hornswoggle (aka Dylan Postl) called in ahead of his fight at Rough N' Rowdy 14 in Morgantown. Despite being an entertainer by trade, he's taking this fight against Jeremy Dynamite Smith personally. He's been training for seven weeks and wants to prove that his lifetime of taking bumps in a ring has prepared him for the chaos of R&R better than any traditional training.
HornswoggleI am going to make people know who Jeremy Smith is for once by fighting him.
I'm going to box. I'm going to fight. I'm going to make people know who the fuck Jeremy Smith is for once. ... and I'm going to make some money.
Big Cat, a noted Bears fan, nearly lost his mind when he realized Hornswoggle is a die-hard Packers fan. The interview took a turn toward the hostile as Big Cat threatened to fight him after the match, but Hornswoggle didn't blink, noting that he's been hit by better people than Big Cat.
HornswoggleWWE's X-Pac would have anyone's back in a bar fight.
I feel like X-Pac would have anyone's back in a bucket. He just wants some action, yeah. He just wants the fight, yeah.
Fyre Fest and Hank's Vocabulary
Fyre Fest of the week delivered a Hall of Fame moment for Hank. After nearly 28 years on this planet, Hank admitted he had no idea how to pronounce the word "pint." He’s been calling it a "pent" this whole time, which led to a trip down memory lane of his greatest linguistic failures.
Big CatHank's greatest hits: Thailand, Ob-jen, Pint, Post Mostly, Super Relatives
What are Hank's greatest hits? There's Thailand. There's Ob-jen. Pint. Post Mostly. Super Relatives.
Big Cat wrapped things up by admitting that while we all had to pretend to hate the European Super League to save the soul of soccer, the actual product would have been incredible television.
Big CatThe European Super League would actually have been sweet because of the high-level matchups.
The Super League kind of would have been sweet. ... Imagine if there was just a Wednesday, like every Wednesday afternoon, just the best teams in the world playing each other. ... would you watch because it's going to be sweet. They'd be like, yeah, I'd watch. ... It would have been fucking sweet.
Next time you're at the bar, just make sure you don't order a "pent" of Guinness.
