We have officially hit that lull in the sports calendar where hand measurements become the most important news in the world. Big Cat and PFT are locked into NFL Combine coverage, mostly because there isn’t much else to do besides watch 20-year-olds run in spandex. PFT has some ideas on how to make the scouting process even more thorough, specifically for the quarterbacks.

Loss

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017

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PFT Commenter

If you can't motivate your sperm to swim, you can't lead an NFL team

I'd like to see them do the combine in the nude... make them jerk off into a cup, test their swimmers out. If you're a quarterback, if you can't motivate your sperm to swim, you can't lead a team.

3:39Hot TakeFootballScorchingSarcastic

Biologically and professionally irrelevant to quarterbacking success.

The guys also broke down the height drama surrounding Mitch Trubisky. Apparently, Hue Jackson has a very strict height requirement for the Browns, and Trubisky might have measured himself right out of a job in Cleveland.

Push

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017

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Big Cat

Mitch Trubisky screwed himself by measuring 6'2" because of Hue Jackson's arbitrary height cutoff

Hugh Jackson, his cutoff for quarterbacks, 6'2". So Mitch Trubisky kind of screwed himself. He should have slouched a little bit, hoping that he went at 6'1"... [Hue] just said, if the quarterback's not 6'2 or taller, I don't want him.

4:12OpinionFootballMedium

Hue Jackson actually preferred Trubisky but was overruled for Garrett. Trubisky was picked 2nd, proving the height didn't scare off everyone.

Roasting the Show with Uncle Chaps

To cleanse the palate before the weekend, our good friend Uncle Chaps stopped by to read some five-star iTunes reviews that were actually just brutal roasts of the cast. We’re talking comparisons to 50-year-old Amish women, fat jokes aimed at Big Cat, and constant reminders that Hank is essentially illiterate. It was a beautiful moment of self-reflection that ended with Big Cat spilling a Red Bull and everyone questioning PFT’s bathroom habits.

Rachel Nichols Joins The Jump (to PMT)

Rachel Nichols hopped on to help make sense of the absolute chaos currently defines the NBA. We started with the Golden State Warriors and Kevin Durant’s leg injury, which Big Cat is convinced will ruin their season even if KD returns for the playoffs.

Loss

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017

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Big Cat

Kevin Durant will never be 100% for the rest of the season

I'm banking on Kevin Durant never being 100% for the rest of the year. Do you think the Warriors are now vulnerable, or is that just wishful thinking from someone who's a Warrior hater?

23:27PredictionBasketballHot

Durant returned for the final games of the regular season and won Finals MVP, looking very much 100%.

Rachel was a bit more optimistic about KD's recovery, noting that elite shooters usually don't lose their touch even if they lose a step. However, she’s much more interested in seeing how the high-flying Rockets would stack up against a hobbled Warriors squad.

Loss

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017

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Rachel Nichols

I want to see the Rockets and Warriors play in the playoffs

I have a lot of fun watching the Rockets play, so I'm kind of hoping that that matchup happens during the playoffs, in the second round, conference finals, whatever it is.

26:39OpinionBasketballMild

The Rockets and Warriors did not meet in the 2017 playoffs (Rockets lost in the 2nd round to Spurs).

Naturally, the conversation turned to LeBron James. The King was spotted walking into a game while reading *The Godfather*, a move so transparently designed for the cameras that Big Cat couldn't let it slide. Rachel tried to defend the fundamental importance of reading, but the guys weren't buying it for a second.

Void

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017

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Big Cat

LeBron James reading 'The Godfather' while walking is a calculated camera stunt

Did you see last night LeBron walking from the bus to the locker room reading The Godfather? And did you also think that was the lamest, most ridiculous thing you've ever seen in your entire life?... He was doing it for camera. He wasn't actually reading.

31:46OpinionBasketballHotSubjective

Subjective. While LeBron frequently poses with books, it's impossible to prove if he's 'actually' reading in that specific moment, though the public perception of it being a stunt is widely shared.

Then things got dark. Big Cat forced Rachel to discuss the Chicago Bulls, a team that seems to be playing a game of management Jenga where they just keep pulling out the most important blocks. Rachel didn't hold back on the lack of direction in the front office.

Win

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017

#24356#PMT-2017-0303-24356

Rachel Nichols

The Chicago Bulls front office has no clear vision

They just haven't had a clear vision, right? ... If they had decided we're going to rebuild, rebuild. If they decided we're going to build around Jimmy Butler, build around Jimmy Butler. Stop dangling his name in trade talks.

40:42OpinionBasketballMedium

The Bulls eventually chose to rebuild by trading Butler months later, confirming they lacked a cohesive plan at this moment.

Big Cat’s Bulls fandom has reached a point of cynical enlightenment. He knows exactly how the cycle works: they win a big game on national TV just to give the fans hope, then immediately crater against the worst team in the league.

Win

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017

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Big Cat

The Bulls will beat the Warriors on TNT and then lose to a shitty team

They're going to beat the Warriors tonight. It's a home game on TNT on a Thursday night. The Bulls will beat the Warriors, and I will say the Bulls are back, and that will happen. And that happens every single, like, every three weeks, and then they lose to some shitty-ass team.

43:19PredictionBasketballMedium

The Bulls DID beat the Warriors 94-87 on March 2nd (the night before this dropped) and then famously lost to teams like the Knicks and 76ers later that month.

Spinzone and Tell Da Truth

To wrap things up, the guys hit some of their favorite segments. PFT offered a brilliant Spinzone for the San Francisco 49ers, who currently have zero quarterbacks on their active roster. It’s a bold strategy, but it might be exactly what Kyle Shanahan needs to keep his play-calling in check.

Void

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017·Spin Zone

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PFT Commenter

The 49ers having no quarterbacks is liberating for Kyle Shanahan's play-calling

If you don't have any quarterbacks on your roster, then there's no chance that Kyle Shanahan is going to be able to call too many passing plays late in a game that they're winning... Shanahan's just taking away his ability to throw the ball too much.

53:48Hot TakeFootballHotSubjectiveSarcastic

Purely satirical analysis of Shanahan's coaching tendencies.

In a more macabre segment of Tell Da Truth, the guys investigated the disappearance of Redskins GM Scott McCloughan. PFT has a theory that this isn't just a front-office disagreement, but a full-blown *Weekend at Bernie's* scenario orchestrated by Dan Snyder.

Loss

Take Slip·Mar 3, 2017·Tell Da Truth

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PFT Commenter

Redskins GM Scott McCloughan has been dead for a year and is a Weekend at Bernie's situation

I think [Scott McCloughan] has been dead for a year... and so it's Bruce Allen who's just pretending like Scott [is alive]. That's actually a great move. If you want to deflect blame to somebody else, have a dead guy in the closet.

57:10Hot TakeFootballScorchingSarcastic

McCloughan was not dead; he was fired less than a week later on March 9th.

We finished with a little Bad Radio featuring Jaleel Okafor. If you thought James Harden’s defensive highlights from three years ago were bad, wait until you see Okafor standing perfectly still while a guy shoots a jumper directly in his face. It’s a process, we just aren't sure which one yet.

Big Cat remains the only person in the world who thinks a 6'2" quarterback is too tall for the Browns.