Jim Gaffigan, Coaching Carousel + Don't F*ck With Cats Documentary Review

You have to compare Joe Judge immediately to John Harbaugh

You have to compare [Joe Judge] immediately to John Harbaugh. Of course. And say, okay, this guy could work. Because not enough special team guys get opportunities.

I would rather hire Matt Rhule than Nick Saban or Urban Meyer

I actually would feel more comfortable getting a Matt Rhule type than like an Urban Meyer or even a Nick Saban... Matt Rule did more with less. Temple is not really a football powerhouse. Baylor was obviously in kind of a disaster zone. So he wasn't beating guys with just going out and getting all the recruits... He was beating them, I would assume, with at least some X's and O's.

Mike McCarthy is just a fatter version of Jason Garrett

It's a great hire for Jerry Jones because he basically just hired a fatter Jason Garrett. Do you think Mike McCarthy's going to steal the show in Dallas? Do you think he's going to make the headlines?

Mike McCarthy only winning one Super Bowl with Aaron Rodgers makes him just an okay coach

If you asked any Packer fan, though, and let's just say that Aaron Rodgers is not going to win another Super Bowl, the fact that Mike McCarthy had Aaron Rodgers that type of talent and they only won one is an okay coach.

There is a Blake of the Year curse

So it's time to ask, is there a Blake of the Year curse? You've got Griffin [surgery]. Bortles got traded. He moved teams... and went bald.

Stephen A. Smith will be extra spicy because of his apple cider vinegar cleanse

Stephen A. Smith just announced that he's going on a seven-day apple cider vinegar cleanse... He's going to be on a First Take just with a mouth tasting like all kinds of soy sauce... and he's going to have an empty belly. He's going to be sweating... a hungry dog runs faster.

College bowl games are boring and pointless

Good riddance. Bowls are boring. What's the point?

I think Tom Brady is going to sign with the Tennessee Titans

I think he's going to the Titans. Because of Vrabel. They've got a running back. They've got a good team. They've got salary cap.

Men turn uglier and uglier as they get older

As you get older, men turn uglier and uglier... George Clooney and Brad Pitt, those guys are flukes. That was like a mistake. I would say that most guys are disgusting, right? It's just a known fact.

Madison Prewett will win The Bachelor because her dad is the Auburn coach

My prediction is there is a girl who is a four-time state championship basketball player, and she goes to Auburn, and her dad is the coach of Auburn... My money's on her. Clearly, she knows the long haul, the grind.

The murderer in Don't F*ck With Cats was not a genius mastermind

This guy is not as smart as everyone's making him out to be. He is not some mastermind. He's a fucked up piece of shit... he's narcissistic and he got caught in like three days.