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Void
Big CatBig Cat

Jeff Bezos hates fat people, poor people, and people with weak bladders

I'm pretty confident in saying Jeff Bezos hates fat people. He hates poor people. It's people who have like weak bladders, he hates. There's a lot of people that Jeff Bezos finds disgusting. That's a fact.

This is a satirical characterization based on labor reports and Bezos's public persona.

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Void
Sep 16, 2022
#10391
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Justin Herbert is to blame for the pick-six because he should have known Gerald Everett was gassed

I'm gonna blame Justin Herbert for that pick-six and not [Gerald] Everett, because he should have known that Everett was tired and asking out of the game and he should have gone to somebody else. If Justin Herbert's the guy that he's supposed to be... then he needs to be able to make the decision to go somewhere else with that ball and not to your receiver who's puking all over himself.

The pick-six was the turning point of the game, and while Herbert threw the ball, Everett was clearly signaling to the sideline he was gassed, which is widely considered a coaching or personnel failure.
Win
Sep 16, 2022
#10393
Big CatBig Cat

Brandon Staley has 'blue-pilled' himself into becoming a conservative coach

It's almost like Brandon Staley flew too close to the sun last year. And you know how in the Matrix you get red-pilled or you get blue-pilled? ...Brandon Staley blue-pilled himself and he's going back to being just like a normal conservative coach. Punting on fourth and short, fourth and third. I don't like that. I like Brandon Staley a little crazy.

Staley's 2022 season was indeed statistically less aggressive on fourth downs compared to his historic 2021 pace.
Loss
Sep 16, 2022·Picks
#10405
HankHank

I'm taking the Broncos -10 over the Texans because of the altitude advantage

Denver Broncos minus 10 makes no sense to me and therefore I'm gonna take it. The Broncos lost in September at home... they're covering machines because of the altitude and the heat... that combo is a killer.

The Broncos won 16-9, failing to cover the -10 point spread.

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Big CatBig Cat

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

The 'cheat code' status of a team's over is based on a specific run of games; eventually, Vegas adjusts the lines.
Win
Big CatBig Cat

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

The bounty itself is a factual offer made by the hosts.
Void
Big CatBig Cat

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?

The Dolphins' internal view on 'everything being on the table' is a subjective claim about team strategy.