As soon as the first quarter of the first preseason game is over, I am done with the preseason

Every Hall of Fame game's the exact same... Seeing the field is great. And then you're just like, okay, this kind of sucks. I want the real football. It's very funny. When the first preseason game happens, I'm so excited to watch it. And then as soon as we get through the first quarter, the first preseason game, I'm like just fucking get over with the preseason, I'm done with the preseason.

I still believe in Kyle Sloter as the preseason quarterback of all time

Kyle Sloter, who right now is beating the Raiders three to nothing... He stinks? He's preseason quarterback of all time. The fourth quarter too. There's still the fourth quarter Kyle Sloter. I still believe in him. If you've watched him play, you should believe too.

The Cleveland Browns are the 'rapist franchise' for betting on a light Deshaun Watson sentence

Anytime you're like I'm betting on a sex criminal getting a light sentence. That's the good thing that can happen for me. You're fucked. It's also like betting on Hitler to win World War II. Right? It's like you won, but it's like now you're the rapist franchise. Yeah. Congratulations.

I will be calling college football this fall

If I make myself publicly fully available right now, best case scenario, I'm in the booth calling college football this fall. Is that gonna happen? Is that reality? I don't know. But the odds are going to increase by making this jump right now.

The French Open court conditions were to blame for Novak Djokovic's meniscus injury

He blamed the court surface because of the rain. He asked them to wipe it multiple times and they did not approve... could this injury have been prevented? Possibly if there was just a little bit more frequent care of the court.

Dots Pretzels are the most addictive snack in existence

I've never been addicted to a snack more than this. And it's dangerous. It is crazy.