Prisons are dangerous because inmates aren't allowed to masturbate

That's why our prisons are so dangerous, because there's a bunch of guys that can't crank it. They just got testosterone going out their eyeballs.

I disagree with firing an SEC coach for seeing an escort in Tampa

I disagree with firing an SEC coach for going to see an escort, though, especially if it's in Tampa. That's home of that situation. That's a boys be boys situation.

I used to think my testicles were made of Play-Doh and eating more would make them bigger

My number one, I used to think that your testicles were Play-Doh. So I thought if you just ate more Play-Doh, you'd have bigger balls. I used to eat Play-Doh. For sure. I mean, it's kind of like the Bruce Arians drinking paint there. You got to try all things if you want to have bigger balls.

I gave my NBA MVP vote to Shai Gilgeous-Alexander.

I actually voted for Shai. And it was a very, very, very hard vote... The Thunder had 18 more wins than the Nuggets. Right. At some point I don't always vote for the guy who's the highest in the standings, but at some point that matters.

LeBron James should take significantly less money to win another championship ring

If it were me, I would say I will take significantly less, as less as it helps basically to make sure that we get other people in here who can help us win. Because here's the thing, you can't buy a championship ring after you retire all that money... He's not gonna feel any difference in his life.

The Celtics will win the NBA Championship

Before the season I picked the Boston Celtics. With the Boston Celtics down two to one in this series, I still pick the Boston Celtics... they're the best complete team and they just won last year.