I'm officially done with the preseason after one quarter of the Hall of Fame game

Every Hall of Fame game's the exact same. Seeing the helmets is great. Seeing the field is great. And then you're just like, okay, this kind of sucks. I want the real football. ... As soon as the first quarter of the first preseason game is over, I'm like just fucking get over with the preseason. I'm done with the preseason. Get me to the regular season.

I still believe in Kyle Sloter as the preseason quarterback of all time

Kyle Sloter, who right now is beating the Raiders three to nothing... He stinks? He's preseason quarterback of all time. The fourth quarter too. There's still the fourth quarter Kyle Sloter. I still believe in him. If you've watched him play, you should believe too.

Vin Scully is the best play-by-play broadcaster of all time

Yeah, no, definitely. He is the best play-by-play broadcaster of all time. He has moments that you could put in a dictionary. Like you could fill a dictionary with just thousands of pages... If I could have 1% of the success that he had, that would be a successful career. He is the best ever.

The Patriots shouldn't be allowed to have a good quarterback like Drake Maye immediately after Bill Belichick.

It fucking kills me that the Patriots are good... the fact that these cocksuckers get a good core, I, it's like... they don't deserve a good quarterback immediately. If Drake Maye developed schizophrenia and he is only good half the time and you don't know which personality's playing, they deserve that.

Turkey is a 'peasant bird' and doesn't belong on the Thanksgiving table

I'm not fucking settling for peasant for the peasant bird. Thank you very much... Turkey is dog shit. You guys don't know how cook Turkey.

The Ravens will win the Super Bowl as a Wild Card underdog

Yes, of course. They're winning the Super Bowl. It's faded to be, we're going as the fucking wild card... we're gonna fucking get revenge on everyone. This will be, this is how it's done.