Tiger Woods is the only person who can pull off a mock turtleneck; anyone else would look like a tube of cookie dough

The mock turtleneck, short sleeve, tight shirt, people are going nuts over and you're going to see a lot of guys that try to pull off this look that Tiger's got right now. And it's only Tiger that can pull this off. If you or I showed up, it would look like we got a big tube of cookie dough that got left out in the sun for three days.

LeBron James is noble for missing the playoffs to give young NBA stars the spotlight

LeBron decided that now was the time to step away from the game and put the spotlight on some up and coming players that might not be able to get that much attention if LeBron was still around dominating the conversation.

The Dodgers will beat the Mariners in the 2022 World Series

The Dodgers versus the Mariners. Dodgers win. I'm going to go like that. Mariners going to be the playoffs in 20 years.

Men avoid laughing at comedy because they don't want to surrender control of their consciousness

Tough guys never dance and tough guys often don't like laughing. They don't like comedy. If I'm doing comedy and there's someone in the front row with their arms crossed and they're daring me to invade them... it's because they don't want to give you control of their consciousness. Women tend to be more okay with giving you the control.

The awareness of death is what makes things like ice cream taste better

The fact that we're only here for a time imbues this moment with a richness that wouldn't be there if I lived forever. The stakes of death are what give life more value. And I would say make ice cream a little bit more delicious because it means more that you know it might be your last.