PMT DB
PMT DB
Tom Segura and Pete Holmes on Comedy, Tigers Return, and MLB Picks
Tiger Woods is officially back at Augusta, and nature is healing. Big Cat and PFT started the show getting swept up in the Tiger mania that only a Masters Friday can provide. While the world is focused on the leaderboard, PFT was more focused on the aesthetics, specifically Tiger’s ability to pull off a very specific wardrobe choice that would ruin a normal man.
PFT CommenterTiger Woods is the only person who can pull off a mock turtleneck; anyone else would look like a tube of cookie dough
The mock turtleneck, short sleeve, tight shirt, people are going nuts over and you're going to see a lot of guys that try to pull off this look that Tiger's got right now. And it's only Tiger that can pull this off. If you or I showed up, it would look like we got a big tube of cookie dough that got left out in the sun for three days.
Naturally, any conversation about a legend in the twilight of his career led the guys straight to LeBron James. Big Cat pointed out how convenient it was for LeBron to miss the playoffs right when the league has enough young stars to fill the void, though he expects LeBron to find a way to make the postseason about himself anyway.
Big CatLeBron James will eventually declare himself a huge Ja Morant fan and try to get him traded to the Lakers
I'll just call my shot right now. [LeBron James] is going to become the biggest Ja Morant fan, baby Braun. Cause you know Ja Morant will do something insane in the playoffs and he'd be like, holy shit, I'd love to play with him. Can we get him traded to the Lakers?
Baseball is Back
With Opening Day finally here, it was time for the annual tradition of making World Series picks that will surely be mocked by August. Big Cat is backing a West Coast showdown, predicting the Mariners finally end their drought only to lose at the finish line.
Big CatThe Dodgers will beat the Mariners in the 2022 World Series
The Dodgers versus the Mariners. Dodgers win. I'm going to go like that. Mariners going to be the playoffs in 20 years.
PFT is leaning into the city of brotherly love, riding with the reigning MVP and a lineup full of sluggers to take down the Bronx Bombers.
PFT CommenterThe Phillies will win the 2022 World Series over the Yankees
I like the Phillies a lot. They have the reigning MVP... I think it's going to be the Phillies against the Padres in the [NLCS] and then the winner of that... I'm going to say as the real world series champion... but no, out of the AL teams, I really think this is the year the Yankees get it done. I think it's going to be the [Phillies vs.] Yankees.
Not to be outdone, the rest of the office threw their hats in the ring. Billy is looking for a classic Braves-Yankees matchup, while Jake Marsh is taking the White Sox to go all the way against the Phillies.
Billy FootballThe 2022 World Series will be the Yankees against the Braves
Yankees, Braves.
Jake MarshThe 2022 World Series will be the White Sox against the Phillies
White Sox, Phillies.
Tom Segura and the Injury that Broke the Internet
Tom Segura joined the show to discuss his massive 200-city tour and, more importantly, the horrific basketball injury that went viral. Tom walked through the vivid memory of the moment his arm and leg gave out simultaneously, noting that his brain prioritized the arm pain so much he didn't even realize his leg was broken for days. He also shared his newfound appreciation for hospital-grade pain management.
Tom SeguraDilaudid is the greatest thing I've ever experienced
Dilaudid... That is the greatest thing I've ever experienced. I mean, it was really... that shit is amazing. I mean, that's medical heroin and it makes you want to try heroin. It's so good.
The conversation shifted to the gambling world, where Tom dropped a bombshell about UFC President Dana White’s legendary runs at the blackjack table.
Tom SeguraDana White is banned from most major casinos for winning millions at blackjack
Dana White is banned from almost every major casino for playing blackjack because he has taken them for millions. He has a system and one of the casinos, they gave him a belt and they're like you are the champ and you are ready to kick somebody out. I don't know what his system is and we're talking walking out with like, 'Hey, I won $1.3 million playing blackjack.'
Pete Holmes on the Art of the Laugh
Pete Holmes stopped by the studio to talk about his new CBS show *How We Roll* and the transition from the "lone wolf" energy of stand-up to the family dynamic of a multi-cam sitcom. Pete and the guys got deep into the psychology of why some people—specifically "tough guys"—refuse to enjoy a comedy show.
Pete HolmesMen avoid laughing at comedy because they don't want to surrender control of their consciousness
Tough guys never dance and tough guys often don't like laughing. They don't like comedy. If I'm doing comedy and there's someone in the front row with their arms crossed and they're daring me to invade them... it's because they don't want to give you control of their consciousness. Women tend to be more okay with giving you the control.
To wrap up an uncharacteristically philosophical segment, Pete tried to explain his theory on why mortality actually improves the flavor profile of frozen desserts. Big Cat wasn't buying it initially, but Pete’s persistence on the "stakes of death" eventually won the room over.
Pete HolmesThe awareness of death is what makes things like ice cream taste better
The fact that we're only here for a time imbues this moment with a richness that wouldn't be there if I lived forever. The stakes of death are what give life more value. And I would say make ice cream a little bit more delicious because it means more that you know it might be your last.
Fyre Fest of the Week
Hank is still living in a nightmare following Duke’s loss to UNC in the Final Four. He admitted that the loss has permanently altered his psyche, knowing that Big Cat now holds the ultimate trump card for every sports argument they will ever have for the rest of time.
HankLosing to UNC in Coach K's final game will haunt me for the rest of my life
Whenever I'm happy, whenever anything goes in my life, whenever I'm feeling good or like something Patriots, Celtics, whatever it may be. I just know that Daniel Katz is gonna just at any chance he gets be like, 'Hey, remember when we killed coach K and the final four and UNC beat Duke in their last two games.' And it's just going to bring me down.
Between the Masters, Opening Day, and two of the funniest people on the planet, it’s a tier-one sports weekend, so make sure you schedule your naps accordingly.
