The Chicago Bears are for real

The Bears are for real. Never meant to make Cam Newton cry. See his outfit. What a real weird guy. John Fox has his team playing John Fox football, which means he takes his [team] back to a time before the forward pass existed.

Millennials are ruining football because their brittle bones are not breastfed long enough

It's millennials that are ruining football, but with their brittle little bones, they're not breastfed until a proper age, and so they all get hurt.

The Atlanta Falcons are officially pretenders

The Falcons are pretenders. They are officially in the pretenders pile. You know what's great, too, is I think they started like 2-0 and everyone was like, see, told you, the Falcons do not have a Super Bowl hangover. Now you see them. They are mentally just broken.

The Hall of Fame needs to go back to the old 80% up-or-down voting system for each finalist

They should have forced the voters to say yes or no on Bill Belichick. And they need to go back to what's the easiest fix here. Go back to the system where the finalists each have an 80% up or down, yes or no vote like it used to be. It's fundamentally unfair.

17 NFL teams will be playing in domes within the next 10 years

Seventeen teams are gonna be playing in domes within the next 10 years. The way things are currently going, the Chiefs are moving into a dome.

The Browns will be looking for another coach within two or three years

I'm fairly confident they'll be looking for another coach within two or three years.