Jay Mariotti is just a troll looking for attention

It's called a troll that's looking for attention. And I absolutely played right into what he wanted.

Jeff Fisher couldn't even succeed at losing, which is the most losing thing of all

In my opinion, if you're going to do something, be the best at it. He couldn't even succeed at losing, which is really the most losing thing of all.

Donald Trump has nothing to worry about and will serve two full terms as President

So [Trump] met with Kanye today... And Kanye tweeted after he was originally going to run in 2020. He's not going to run until 2024... So Trump is good. Trump has nothing to worry about. Two terms. Eight years. The only thing holding him back from not being president is now over.

The goal allowed by the US goalie was the most embarrassing possible

What about the goalie? Yeah, I mean he... that was the most embarrassing goal that I've ever seen. Possible.

The USMNT is the 'James Franklin Penn State' of soccer

People were making very mean jokes online that we were James Franklin, Penn State. And it is actually perfectly appropriate because if you look at who we played, we beat the teams we're supposed to beat... and then we absolutely got ass fucked by the team that was better than us in Belgium. We are not who we thought we were.

We just suck at soccer as a country and that's okay

My take is we suck at soccer and that's okay. Like, I don't care that we suck at soccer anymore. I'm going to root for the US team. I'm gonna get excited when we're in a World Cup. I'm gonna get hyped up and it's gonna be fun to watch. And then I'm gonna be reminded that we suck at soccer and that it's just gonna be like, okay, yeah, that's okay.