The Boston Celtics are dead

The Boston Celtics are dead.

The New York Rangers are playing unsustainable hockey and got lucky against Pittsburgh

Rangers fans were losing it because I was like, yes, this team has had success all year, but fuck, do they give up a lot of high, dangerous scoring chances and rely on their goaltending. I think that they're going to get worked in playoffs... believe me when I say they got so lucky that Jarry got hurt and they had to play a three third string goalie, they got [worked].

The Celtics are the better team and will win the series if they execute

If [the Celtics] just have to execute and play their game, they're going to win the series. But I'm just worried... it feels like they are the better team similar to honestly the Heat series where it's like, they're the better team. So it almost makes it worse when games are close and they lose games.

An adult man cannot wear a sun shirt at a pool unless they are a ginger or a toddler

You can't as an adult man, you can't wear a sun [shirt] unless you're a ginger. Understand that unless you're a ginger and you, if you wear a sun shirt, you just look like a toddler. You look like a toddler at the pool. You can't be doing that. Sun shirts, toddlers, gingers, 50 plus.

Michigan was definitively the better team in the National Championship and it never felt like UConn was in danger of winning.

Michigan was the better team. We all saw it. It never felt like [the game] was in danger. Like the only moment that I was like, oh, UConn might have a chance, was when there was like maybe five and a half minutes left and Mullens missed that three to cut it to four.

Michigan was the best team all year — outside of Duke, who would have won the championship by a lot

They were the best team. They were the best team all year outside of Duke. 'Cause that actually was my other big takeaway — Duke just completely, Duke beat this Michigan team a month and a half ago.