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HankHank

Ronald Acuña Jr. should be the face of baseball.

Ronald Acuna Jr. Face of baseball? Face of baseball. He should be... He had like a 420-foot home run, and he beat out an infield single on the same game. He's got it all. Five tool player.

The 'face of baseball' is an unofficial and subjective title, though Acuña did go on to win the NL MVP in 2023.

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Void
Apr 12, 2021
#14661
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Tiger Woods would have won the 2021 Masters if he had been able to play

I think Tiger [Woods] would have won this Masters, I'll be honest with you. I agree.

This is entirely speculative as Tiger Woods was recovering from a major car accident at the time and could not compete.
Loss
Apr 12, 2021
#14662
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Hideki Matsuyama should serve blowfish liver at the Champions Dinner next year

If I'm Hideki, I serve blowfish liver and let the chips fall where they may maybe thin out the field a little bit. See who gets poisoned.

Matsuyama served a menu including Miyazaki Wagyu, but did not serve poisonous blowfish liver.
Void
Apr 12, 2021
#14663
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Brooks Koepka is a hero for playing the Masters on one leg

We should also say the real winner of this Masters is Brooks Koepka. Competing on one leg like a warrior. Walking paralyzed man. Exactly. So the fact he was even able to get out there and play two rounds of golf. That's impressive.

Koepka did play through a significant knee injury, but 'hero' status is a subjective characterization used for comedic effect.

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HankHank

This is the Knicks' championship to lose

This series is over. Right. And the Spurs Thunder series looks like it's going at least six, probably seven. Like it looks like an absolute battle. Yeah. So that's good for them. The Spurs all things, I mean, this is, this is the Knicks championship to lose.

The Knicks are currently in the second round/Conference finals (implied), so they haven't won the championship yet.
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HankHank

My official stance on the Toucher & Rich radio beef is simply 'fuck 'em'

I'm not leading this battle. They took a shot. I said fuck him. And that's where I stand... Official stance. So you guys can just fuck him.

Subjective personal stance.
Loss
HankHank

I did not fart during the Kellen Moore interview; it was just air that fell out of my body

The sound did come out of me, my body. But it was not a conscious fart... Most farts air coming out of your asshole, max, most farts max have to push. Like most farts, you're like, this one fell out... I was not like, consciously like, oh, I got a fart. But when I lifted up my leg, I, I guess I had like gas down there... A dude came out of my ass. That was so loud.

It was definitively a fart.