Matt Ryan stinks

Today is Friday, September 7th and Matt Ryan stinks. Is Matt Ryan hurt? Because he's not good.

The Green Zone is football for morons and I love it

The green zone is essentially when they have the first down to gain and it is third down, they make the field look extra green between the line of scrimmage and the first down marker to let you know how much area they need to cover to get that first down. It is essentially football for morons, which we are, and I love it.

You can't complain about Steve Sarkisian's bad play calling because that's exactly what he is

Everyone's blaming [Steve] Sarkisian for everything just because he sucks at play calling. That's not his fault. That's who he is. If you hire Sark to be your offensive coordinator, you should know what you're going to get, and you can't complain about it.

Getting excited for the NFL schedule release is for pussies

I can't get it up for the schedule release because it's—if you explained what the schedule release was to Vince Lombardi, he'd call you a pussy and spit in your face.

The NFL should release one game schedule per day for the entire off-season

The NFL, they should do, they should draw it out even longer. It should be one game that Roger Goodell releases per day for the entire off-season. And then at the end of it, he's like, okay, let's play some ball.

The Preakness Stakes should move its date to three weeks before the Kentucky Derby

Why doesn't the Preakness just say, screw it to the Kentucky Derby and schedule their main race for like three weeks before the Kentucky Derby? You wanna play hardball? Yeah, you could play hardball. I feel like if you, if your horse wins the Preakness, if it was scheduled for before the Derby, you're not skipping the derby. No, you gotta run in the derby.