The Dodgers have already won the World Series after the trade deadline

The winners and losers of the trade deadline, the Dodgers have won it all. Just give them the trophy right now. You get Yu Darvish. Yeah.

Colin Kaepernick isn't being signed because his vegan diet makes him physically weak

I think that the reason [Kaepernick] is not being signed is because he's not taking care of his body. He's made up of plant proteins. Not animal proteins, and he's just not as... resilient. I've never seen a plant win a fight.

The government has already won the spying game because everyone willingly put Alexa listening devices in their homes

Big Brother, you thought that the government was going to start putting robots in our houses. They just flipped the script and they're like, everyone has to go buy those stupid Alexa things. And they willingly put it in their house. And now we've been spied on. And now it's over. If you buy an Alexa, you're done. It has your credit card information. You're done.

Duke would have won the National Championship by 50 points if they had reached the final.

I think if Duke plays in the championship game, they win by 50. Easily. That was a wasted opportunity.

Michigan is already the favorite to win the National Championship again next season.

Michigan I think is right now the favorites to win next season. Tough to win back to back, but he has to hit the portal. He has to be active... which he already is.

College basketball is now 'pay to win' and that's unsustainable

It's a pay to win tournament. Like basketball is ruined. Unsustainable. Yeah, that's the new word that I keep hearing.