Skip to content
PMTPMT DB
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Every non-soccer sporting event should be settled using penalty kicks

Even any event that's not a soccer event should also be settled using PKs because they're electric.

Inherently subjective and satirical proposal.

More from this episode

View episode
Win
Oct 1, 2018
#12223
Big CatBig Cat

The Dolphins continue to be candy-ass frauds who always suck

The Patriots probably are good, and the Dolphins continue to be their candy-ass fraud selves. I'm so sick of the Dolphins. I think we need to put an official disclaimer every year. Like, hey, the Dolphins might start hot. Just remember, they always suck.

The Dolphins started 3-0 but finished 7-9 and missed the playoffs in 2018.
Win
Oct 1, 2018
#12224
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Patriots are officially back

The Patriots look pretty good, I guess... The Patriots are kind of back, I think. This is their annual thing where they make us think that they're done with the dynasty.

The Patriots won Super Bowl LIII later this season.
Loss
Oct 1, 2018
#28080
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chicago Bears are the best team in the NFC and will win the Super Bowl

They happen to be playing against the best team in the NFC, future Super Bowl champion Chicago Bears. So you can't really say that Fitzmagic is over. They just were in a buzzsaw situation.

The Bears finished 12-4 but lost to the Eagles in the Wild Card round (the 'Double Doink' game).

More from PFT Commenter

View profile
Win
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The overturning of Folarin Balogun's suspension is the smallest piece of justice the United States has ever received from FIFA

The United States has never benefited from FIFA's corruption before, and it feels like we've been left out of that party. If this is our taste of the corruption, and all the corruption is just overturning a suspension that should never have been given in the first place... it's the smallest piece of justice that the United States could ever get from FIFA.

The USMNT did successfully have Balogun's suspension rescinded during the 2026 World Cup.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The sensor chips inside soccer balls are bullshit and not perfectly aligned with the cameras

I'm so deep into this chip in the ball thing, I've become convinced that it's all bullshit. The sensors, yes, they're there and yes, they pick up on stuff, but there's no chance that it is perfectly aligned with the 50 cameras that are running concurrently in the stadium on live TV at any given time.

This is a subjective claim about technical precision, though PFT expresses strong doubt.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Brandon Aiyuk is in a bad space mentally and will not be signing with the Washington Commanders.

The Washington Commanders have released Brandon [Aiyuk] today from the contract that he didn't sign with us and was never going to sign. Things got kind of weird over the weekend. So [Aiyuk] was saying like talking shit about Jayden's mom... I think that should probably put an end to the Brandon [Aiyuk] to the Commanders rumors. But I was never really on board for it, it's been weird for quite some time with Brandon. I hope he gets whatever help he needs. It doesn't seem like he's in a good space mentally. And it seems like even his best oldest friends have tried to help him and he just burns those bridges too.

Subjective opinion on Aiyuk's mental state and burned bridges, plus a prediction about not going to the Commanders.