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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

If a bear can use nunchucks, a gorilla can fly a Black Hawk helicopter

It turns out that bears actually can use weapons... If a bear can pick up a nunchuck, a gorilla can pick up a fucking rocket launcher. A gorilla would be able to fly like a Black Hawk helicopter if a bear is able to use these martial art weapons.

While bears and primates can be trained to use simple tools, there is no evidence of a gorilla piloting aircraft.

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Win
Jul 15, 2020
#9899
Big CatBig Cat

The next two weeks are make-or-break for the return of sports

I feel like this next week and a half, two weeks, is going to be make or break for the next six months to a year. We have baseball hopefully starting next Thursday, basketball bubbles going, scrimmages about to start, hockey, and then training camp. If these can go off without a hitch, I think we're back.

Major sports leagues successfully returned in late July and August 2020 (the 'Bubble' era) and completed their seasons.
Loss
Jul 15, 2020
#9900
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Washington Redskins should change their name to the Red Wolves

The Redskins are changing their name, hopefully, to the Red Wolves. Dan Snyder, if you're listening, the Red Wolves is the way to go for this.

The team initially became the Washington Football Team and eventually the Washington Commanders. 'Red Wolves' was rejected, reportedly due to trademark issues.
Void
Jul 15, 2020
#9901
Big CatBig Cat

Mitch Trubisky's 75 rating in Madden 21 is insane

Mitch Trubisky's a 75 in the new Madden. Insane. He was 79 last year. Goddamn.

Rating a player in a video game is subjective, but given Trubisky's performance in the 2020 season (he was eventually benched for Nick Foles), 75 was arguably generous.

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The Rams' Australia travel plan was an all-time 'fuck it' move

It was a terrible idea that Sean McVay tried to do, but I have to respect how much of an all-time fuck-it move it was to just pretend that time zones don't exist. He was just like, you know what, fuck it, we're not gonna adapt. We're gonna fly in, fly out.

The Rams lost the Australia opener after using the fly-in/fly-out approach, supporting the criticism in this game-specific judgment.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

KOC will get the best out of Kyler Murray

I think that what he's gonna get the absolute best outta Kyler Murray that he possibly can at this point, which I think should be good enough to be a pretty good team this year.

Kyler Murray's 2026 season and Minnesota's performance will determine whether this forecast holds.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Jayden Daniels is going to remind everyone that the bad man is back

I think Jayden Daniels, he's as healthy as he has been since the start of last season. ... I think that he's gonna remind a lot of people who he is. Yeah. That's what I think. I think the bad man might be back.

Daniels' 2026 season will determine whether he re-established himself as an elite or feared quarterback.