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Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

If I am ever on fire, do not piss on me to put it out

I want to say for the record, if I'm ever on fire, don't piss on me. No, just remind me to stop, drop, and roll. It's not going to help unless you're Peter North and have a stream like a fire hose. It's not going to put out the fire. You're just going to be pissing on me as I burn to death.

Scientifically, unless the volume of liquid is sufficient, it wouldn't be effective, but this is a comedic preference.

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Loss
Dec 14, 2018
#18963
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should play their home playoff games in San Diego

I think if they get home field advantage in the playoffs, which is possible... they should play their home games in San Diego. Give it back to the people. San Diegans have suffered long enough.

The Chargers did not play any home games in San Diego during the 2018 playoffs; they played away games at Baltimore and New England.
Loss
Dec 14, 2018
#18961
Big CatBig Cat

If the Bears don't win the Super Bowl, I want the Chargers to win it

obviously I want the Bears to win the Super Bowl, but if the Bears cannot win the Super Bowl, I want the Chargers to win the Super Bowl. They are America's team. This is talking about Antonio Gates, talking about Philip Rivers having fun.

Neither the Bears nor the Chargers won the Super Bowl in 2018; the Patriots did.
Loss
Dec 14, 2018
#18965
Big CatBig Cat

Patrick Mahomes is getting a little too cute with his play style

I think sometimes [Mahomes] gets a little too cute. I think a little too cute. He throws a lot of left-handed passes. ... You know what bothers me is every time there's a penalty, he points way too fast that it's on the other team.

Mahomes won the MVP this season and became an all-time great, making the 'too cute' criticism age poorly.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

James Wood will be a monster this season and hit 35 plus home runs

The only thing I have to look forward to this season is James Wood just being a fucking monster and getting 35 plus home runs. That's the only thing that I'm going to this season looking forward to as a Nats fan.

James Wood is a high-upside prospect, but 35+ home runs for a rookie/young player is a significant mark.
Loss
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Tom Brady never processed 9/11 because he was such a psycho about football

He just had delayed onset grief. Anything that happened during his playing career, he never processed any of it outside of football. Tom Brady probably never processed 9/11. He was such a psycho, all he cared about was football. He probably found out about it like two years ago.

Hyperbolic satirical claim.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Puka Nacua's lawyer is the worst in America for admitting the bite occurred

Puka has hired an attorney who dismissed the conduct as horseplay, but admitted that the bite occurred. It left a temporary mark. So this is not a good lawyer. My problem is, is Puka Nacua has hired the worst lawyer in America to defend him against the biting allegations. Your lawyer should never step in front of a camera and say, 'yes, he did the shit.'

Subjective legal critique.

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