If the Bears don't win the Super Bowl, I want the Chargers to win it

obviously I want the Bears to win the Super Bowl, but if the Bears cannot win the Super Bowl, I want the Chargers to win the Super Bowl. They are America's team. This is talking about Antonio Gates, talking about Philip Rivers having fun.

Patrick Mahomes is getting a little too cute with his play style

I think sometimes [Mahomes] gets a little too cute. I think a little too cute. He throws a lot of left-handed passes. ... You know what bothers me is every time there's a penalty, he points way too fast that it's on the other team.

If I am ever on fire, do not piss on me to put it out

I want to say for the record, if I'm ever on fire, don't piss on me. No, just remind me to stop, drop, and roll. It's not going to help unless you're Peter North and have a stream like a fire hose. It's not going to put out the fire. You're just going to be pissing on me as I burn to death.

Nate Oats needs to teach his players to never let the police look through their phones

Let the Aden Holloway situation be a reminder to everybody that you don't have to let the police look through your phone. I actually point the finger at Nate Oats for this, because Nate Oats, you gotta do a better job of explaining the first through fifth amendments to your players. Given the history that you've had... day one you should have a, get the guys from Morgan & Morgan to come in and be like, 'Do not talk to the police if you're in trouble. Shut the fuck up.'

Mark Pope is on the hot seat at Kentucky after this tournament performance

Mark Pope on the hot seat. I think he is. I mean, I think they're gonna bring him back. I think he's safe for this year, but I think he's going into next year. Seat is warm.

Every major college coaching opening should start by calling Brad Stevens and making him say no

You gotta make him say no. You gotta call Brad Stevens and make him say no. I will personally never stop saying that. He probably wakes up every morning and says no. Voicemail just says, 'Thank you so much for the consideration, but it's gonna be a no.' It would be shocking if he ever took another college job.