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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Joe Flacco will eventually draw a pass interference call on a spike

I think Joe Flacco is probably going to be the first quarterback in history to draw a PI [pass interference] on a spike, like when he's just killing the [clock].

This has never happened and is physically impossible under NFL rules.

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Uncle ChapsUncle Chaps

Jack Del Rio stinks

They're starting to wonder if it's more than just the water that smells in Oakland because Jack Del Rio stinks.

Jack Del Rio was fired by the Raiders on December 31, 2017, following a 6-10 season.
Win
Dec 11, 2017
#19431
Big CatBig Cat

The Chargers will be the best team to not make the playoffs

The [LA] Chargers might be the hottest team in the NFL right now... ever since I said they were going to be the best team to not make the playoffs and you guys laughed. The Raiders probably will be the best team to not make the playoffs [initially], but I was so right. This Chargers team not only is their schedule cupcakes, but they are balling.

The Chargers finished 9-7 and missed the playoffs on a tiebreaker with the Bills and Titans. They were widely considered one of the best teams excluded from the 2017 postseason.
Loss
Dec 11, 2017
#19432
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers are going to make the playoffs

I am sorry about the Raiders comment, but you were very wrong about the Chargers comment because they are going to make the playoffs.

The Chargers missed the playoffs at 9-7 due to tiebreakers.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.