Kawhi Leonard and Steve Ballmer are a match made in heaven

The Kawhi Leonard robot mixed with Steve Ballmer's over-the-top insane, insane energy is a match made in heaven.

Adam Silver is on a war against toxic masculinity and can't fine a man for crying

[Steve Ballmer] will just cry. And guess what? Adam Silver, you can't fine a man for crying. As a matter of fact, that's the last thing Adam Silver would ever do because he is on a full war against toxic masculinity. And mental health is a big issue.

Overweight men should wear busy patterns to hide their chests

Listen, when you're overweight, you have a choice. And the choice is lose weight or wear designs and patterns that shield your man tits.

The Knicks will probably win the series in five games or even sweep the Cavs

I still think that the, the Knicks are probably gonna win in five. They could even pull off the sweep. I guess the only real question we have for you, 'cause we already, we declared that the New York Knicks have won the series after game one. Correct.

The NBA should rebrand the 'granny shot' as the 'pimp grip' to encourage players to use it

Nobody, no player in the NBA wants to shoot a free throw granny style. But if it's pimp grip, that sounds pretty fucking cool. Listen, if it goes in, it doesn't matter. Like if he and he would, he actually probably get some endorsements from it.

I want the Thunder to win so we can love Victor Wembanyama longer before the inevitable hate cycle starts

I know who I want to win. I want the Thunder to win this series. And the reason why I want the thunder to win this series is because I think if the thunder win, we get to restart the clock on how much longer we get to love Weby before we hate 'em. If the Spurs win this series and then they win their first championship and Weby dominates, we're gonna eventually hate Weby.