Coach K will win 'Retirement of the Year' multiple times because he wants a year-long 'suck my dick' tour

I'm going to say coach K is going to win it this year. And he's going to win next year when he actually does retire because coach K has said that he's going to retire, but he needs everyone to suck his dick for an entire year before he actually retired. He could probably be talked into coming back... then he could have a dynasty of retirement.

The European Super League would have been sick and a great idea

I honestly kind of missed the idea of the super league. I, again, it's bad. We understand football's a sport. Everything else is a business, but super league would have been sick and low key. Imagine Man City against Barcelona on a Wednesday, like twice a year on a Wednesday that you would have. That's just a great idea. Great idea.

Dan Wolken thinks sports should not exist until he personally approves of them

[Dan Wolken] thinks it's sports and he doesn't think that sports should ever exist. He thinks that balls, every ball should be deflated in America until such time that Dan Wolken personally approves of it.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.