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Void
Jan 4, 2017·Drunk Ideas
#21258
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The status of the victim determines the difference between being murdered and being assassinated

What's the difference between a murderer and an assassin? Like at what point if I died, like if somebody killed me on purpose, it's like a John Lennon. If I get killed, is that am I assassinated or am I just murdered? It's a total status question.

The distinction between these terms is linguistic and social, making it subjective.

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Void
Jan 4, 2017
#21256
Big CatBig Cat

The NFL MVP race is boring and I don't care who wins

My take on the MVP is I don't give a fuck. Ooh, that's pretty good. So, yeah, a little hot take there for you. I don't really – I can't get excited about an MVP race.

This is a subjective personal feeling about the level of interest in an award.
Loss
Jan 4, 2017
#6514
HankHank

Tom Brady should be the NFL MVP despite only playing 12 games

If Tom Brady isn't the MVP, it's just further showing [the system is corrupt]... He still had better stats than him. Tom Brady's stats are still better than the other quarterbacks in contention stats. That's the point.

Matt Ryan won the 2016 NFL MVP. Brady finished second.
Loss
Jan 4, 2017
#6515
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Tom Brady is a system quarterback because Jimmy Garoppolo played well in his absence

Well, [Brady] is also a system quarterback because Jimmy Garoppolo played pretty well. So, yeah. You can't give it to a system quarterback.

While Brady obviously flourished in Belichick's system, 'system quarterback' is a pejorative that the sports world generally rejects for Brady.

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Open
Nov 2, 2026
#31796
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
Nov 2, 2026
#31800
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
Nov 2, 2026
#31802
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.