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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Usain Bolt naming his daughter Olympia Lightning Bolt is the greatest name of all time

Olympia lightning bolt. Oh nice, maybe the greatest name of all time.

This is a purely subjective opinion about a child's name.

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Push
Jul 8, 2020
#1827
Big CatBig Cat

Paying Patrick Mahomes this much money will inevitably hurt the Chiefs' roster depth

The ultimate question now is will paying Patrick Mahomes this much hurt the team? And of course it will because he's going to be paid a lot of money. And is it going to be worth it in the long run when you have to figure out a way to Cobble together a team by paying Patrick Mahomes as well.

While the Chiefs did lose Tyreek Hill, they managed to win back-to-back Super Bowls in 2022 and 2023, proving the depth issues were manageable.
Win
Jul 8, 2020
#1821
Big CatBig Cat

Patrick Mahomes is already a Hall of Famer

There are 13 guys who have won Super Bowl MVP and League MVP... nine of them are in the Hall of Fame. The other three are Aaron Rodgers, Peyton Manning, Tom Brady. Then the 13th is Patrick Mahomes. So essentially you're saying he's already a Hall of Famer. Yes.

With three Super Bowl titles, three Super Bowl MVPs, and two NFL MVPs, Mahomes is an absolute certainty for the Hall of Fame.
Open
Jul 8, 2020
#1823
Big CatBig Cat

I would hammer the under on Patrick Mahomes winning 3.5 more Super Bowls

If you though said over under Super Bowls for Patrick Mahomes, and you said it at let's say three and a half, I would hammer the under and that's nothing against Patrick Mahomes. That's just the NFL.

Mahomes currently has 3 rings as of 2024. He needs two more to beat Big Cat's 'under' (which was 3.5 additional from 2020, meaning 4.5 total).

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.