Takes

Kobe Bryant being ranked 13th for the 2010s decade is fair

There was the all-decades list for the 2010s and Kobe was 13 on it, which I honestly think is like fair... If you're looking at the whole decade, his body of work over the 2010s is not like [first team].

NBA players only hit every shot in New York City because the rims are too big

I don't know what it is about that court where every NBA player goes and plays in New York City. I think those rims might be too big because everyone hits every shot. Very soft rims.

Carmelo Anthony was cut by the Rockets because he simply wasn't good at basketball anymore

I think the money he was being paid to play basketball [was why he was cut]. To be shitty at basketball. Yeah... it's not a basketball reason if you can't play basketball anymore.

The Brooklyn Nets officially own Brooklyn over the Knicks

[Big Cat]: Do the Nets own New York? [Joe Harris]: I wouldn't go that far. [Big Cat]: Do you guys own Brooklyn? [Joe Harris]: We definitely own Brooklyn. Hopefully. I don't want to impose on the old Brooklyn Dodgers fans.

Caris LeVert will be an NBA All-Star at some point

Karis [LeVert] is arguably up and coming, maybe all star at some point. Young, really good developing player. Spencer [Dinwiddie], Jared Allen. I mean, you can kind of go down the list.

You must have an NBA championship ring to receive a retirement farewell tour

I think the farewell tour, you need to have a ring. I think you need to have a ring to get a farewell tour. I think that's the threshold.

LeBron James doesn't love his kids because he lets them play basketball instead of football

I would actually say that the worst thing that LeBron James is doing, the proof that he doesn't actually love his kids, is that they're playing basketball and not football. Like LeBron James should have been a football player to begin with. He's always kind of taking the coward's way out.

LeBron James' dunking in layup lines is hurting his son's team by risking technical fouls

We just kind of thought it was a little awkward that he was dunking in a layup line and that technically is a technical foul if we want to go by the letter of the rules so he's hurting his son's team by assessing a technical foul before the game even starts.

LeBron James should have received a technical foul for dunking in his son's AAU layup line

LeBron got in the layup line... Literally in the layup line. It was like throwing down dunks. He should have got a technical foul. They scored. He ran on the court, was celebrating with the team. You're not allowed to dunk in the layup line. That is a technical foul.

LeBron James was taking time and attention away from the kids by dunking in the layup line

Seemed pretty dangerous. Seemed like he was taking time away from the kids. Seemed like the rim probably, the next dunk that goes down, the backboard's going to come down.

Kyrie Irving will become a militant vegan within a month of hanging out with DeAndre Jordan

I got a prediction. You're going to turn Kyrie Irving into a vegan, like within a month. One month of hanging out with Kyrie and he's going to be militant anti-meat. Done. He's going to be throwing fake blood onto Russell Westbrook when he's walking into the arena.

Joel Embiid is the hardest player to guard in the post

I'll probably have to say a guy like Joel Embiid, man. He's a big guy. He can face up, back to the basket, super skilled, extremely strong. So a guy like that probably.

Kawhi Leonard and Steve Ballmer are a match made in heaven

The Kawhi Leonard robot mixed with Steve Ballmer's over-the-top insane, insane energy is a match made in heaven.

Adam Silver is on a war against toxic masculinity

[Steve Ballmer] will just cry. And guess what? Adam Silver, you can't fine a man for crying. As a matter of fact, that's the last thing Adam Silver would ever do because he is on a full war against toxic masculinity.

Michael Jordan's competitive drive is the athlete trait I wish I had most

I'll start with Michael Jordan's competitive drive. That will be my number one.

I don't think Chris Paul will stay in Oklahoma City because they aren't contenders

I just can't see [Chris Paul] really like – Thunder's not really in a position to be like a playoff team or at least contend so I don't know if I see him staying there. At this point in his career I'm sure like the ring is the main objective.

NBA parity is in a great place because there is no clear favorite this year

I actually think it's great for basketball. I mean, the parity in basketball now is... I don't think you can really go into the season this year being like this team is going to win and the odds are stacked. It's going to be like good for basketball.

Golden State would have won the championship if they were healthy

I think Golden State would have won this year [2019] if they were healthy. Like no question.

It's very lame when NBA players get upset about their 2K ratings

Very [lame], yeah. Because it has no control over how you actually are as a player.

Bronny James Jr. is a 'buy' stock for future greatness

This is the anti-pander pick, Bronny James Jr. I'm going to squat on that one. I'm going to buy that stock.

Bronny James Jr. will be a bust

You are forgetting that this is all about a mountain of greatness. Not predicting future greatness. I still went with Bronny James Jr. Plus, he's going to be a bust.

The Clippers are currently a better team than the Lakers

I think the Clippers are the better team right now... one, their pieces fit together... all the role players know their roles... when we look at the Lakers, we see questions all over... Frank Vogel, when we know if LeBron had his druthers, Ty Lue would be the coach.

The Lakers will win a championship within the next two years

I think the Lakers will win it [a championship] within the next two years. I was going to say that. I think the Lakers will win it within the next two years.

LeBron James will finish his career with only four championships

Over under LeBron James championships for his career, four and a half. I would go under. I think he wins one more. One more.

Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving will not win a championship together

If you put a gun to my head and said, will they [Durant and Irving] win a championship, I think I would say no. But I hope they do, and I know they're capable of doing it.

Steph Curry is the greatest shooter in NBA history

Steph Curry's the best shooter in NBA history. Who said it before me? I think I was the first person that I heard say it.

Sam Cassell would be the perfect athlete to storm Area 51 because the aliens would think he's one of them

My second one, I guess I'll go with Sam Cassell. Just because, you know, maybe if there is any type of, like, maybe these guys are like us, they'll see Sam Cassell and be like, all right, that's an ally.

Cleveland fans felt personally rejected by LeBron James when he left for Miami

Number one need in all people is acceptance. Number one fear is rejection. [LeBron] rejected the cities. I'm out of here. So they all felt rejected. We're not good enough. You're leaving us. So that hurt. So they really had a love-hate relationship with him.

The Russell Westbrook-Chris Paul trade was a win-win

The Chris Paul-Russell Westbrook trade, I actually think both teams won. Not won a championship, but I think both teams got something. Like, the Rockets finally have good chemistry again and the Thunder... I actually think they won't be – they'll make the playoffs.

Both the Rockets and Thunder lost the Russell Westbrook-Chris Paul trade

I think both teams lost. I'm not prepared to crown a victor until – this is one of those trades where we really do have to wait for like five years to figure out.

Grayson Allen's reputation for dirty play is back

Grayson Allen's back committing flagrant fouls at a rate unprecedented to players not named Grayson Allen. ... It's great to see a player fall back into the old stereotype that you had on him.

The Clippers would need to win 17 championships to take over Los Angeles

[The Clippers] better watch their back. ... They'd have to win 17 [championships]. They'd have to go 17 in a row probably for people to start saying it's no longer a Laker team.

LeBron James won't be a 'real' Laker until he wins a championship

[LeBron's] got to win the chip, and then he'll be loved. Like all the Lakers that win it, I love. ... Magic got his own lane. Kareem got his own lane. You can't bump them off of what they've done. So LeBron, a championship would get him the love and respect from Laker fans.

Jay Williams claiming Duke could beat the Cavs was his 'arrival moment' in the hot take industry.

The saying, 'Duke can beat the Cavs,' is like Jay Williams' arrival moment. He's just letting everyone know, hey, I'm here now to just spew some bullshit out here. I'm for real.

Zion Williamson is one bad weekend in Vegas away from becoming 'real chonk'.

I've said he's [Zion] one bad weekend in Vegas away from real chonk.

Zion Williamson is the rare Duke player that everyone will root for.

Zion is like the rare dude from Duke that everyone is going to root for.

Zion Williamson would actually play worse if he lost weight.

I think [Zion Williamson] would actually get worse if he lost weight. There's something about his body. He's got power that he can just jump into. It doesn't look as much like an offensive foul if a fat guy runs into you as opposed to like a big jacked up dude.

Russell Westbrook and James Harden will fight over having only one ball in Houston.

There's only one ball, and I'm excited for Russell Westbrook and James Harden to fight over that ball.

Chris Paul essentially has to retire now after being traded to the Thunder.

I actually think Chris Paul has to retire now, right? ... [He'll] get traded to the Oklahoma City Thunder for basically a guy who will hold the ball even more in Russell Westbrook.

Anytime a sports front office says a relationship is 'fine' and reports are false, they are lying.

Anytime, and this counts for coaching, front office, whatever it may be, anytime someone says our relationship is fine and these media reports are false, they are lying. They are always lying, and it always ends up being a trade. The fact that the Houston Rockets tried to convince everyone that James Harden and Chris Paul didn't hate each other's guts is absolutely laughable.

I love Cameron Payne playing in the NBA Summer League after four years in the NBA

My hot seat is the summer league... except Cameron Payne, who is in the summer league, and he's just finished his fourth year in the NBA. He is competing in the summer league. I fucking love this... I hope he plays past when he retires from the NBA and he keeps showing up for the summer league.

The Clippers are a better team than the Lakers heading into the 2019 season

Well, I think the Clippers are better, and I wanted them to get like a knockdown shooter to go along with those two guys... when they struck out on Kawhi, it's just they got a bunch of kind of filler pieces. I mean, I guess they're a little deeper maybe than the Clippers, but I don't know.

The Lakers are Anthony Davis' team, not LeBron James'

I mean, it's Anthony Davis' team. LeBron... you know, I wasn't a huge fan of the whole LeBron thing in the first place, and he was all right last year... I'd rather have Kawhi than LeBron, obviously.

The NBA has the best offseason in sports

The NBA by far and away has the best offseason in terms of the free agency period and players moving around and teams completely changing the course of their next four to five years in a matter of moments.

LeBron James no longer controls the NBA like he used to

The immediate reaction that I had was LeBron James does not control this league like he used to.

Lakers Twitter had the worst two-week showing of any fan base in history

Lakers Twitter had the worst two-week showing of any fan base, basically attacking anyone who would say that Kawhi was going anywhere but the Lakers... It was a full-blown, why wouldn't he go to the Lakers? We're the greatest team of all time, even though we haven't made the playoffs in forever.

I want Russell Westbrook to be traded to Miami for the ultimate second-round exit team

I want him to go to Miami because Russell Westbrook and Jimmy Butler together in Miami, the all-time 44 win, never going to go past the second-round team. Like, they would be a dynasty of that.

Klay Thompson will return early from his ACL injury and the Warriors will be dominant again next spring

Klay Thompson, if there's ever a guy who's going to do the Adrian Peterson, how the fuck is he back so early from an injury? It's Klay Thompson. And don't be shocked if next spring, all of a sudden, it's Klay, Draymond, D'Angelo Russell, and Steph, and being like, how the fuck are they doing this again?

The Brooklyn Nets will be the most combustible team in the East because Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving won't get along

This team [the Nets] is going to be one of the best teams in the East and also one of the most combustible teams in the East because I do not think these guys will get along.

Kyrie Irving and Kevin Durant are the two NBA personalities least likely to get along long-term

Having Kyrie and KD together, those are the two personalities I think are least likely to get along. It's going to be great.