Takes

The Broncos' offensive success is a result of playing terrible defenses

Is there a chance that Russell Wilson, he's looked better, but he has not played a good defense? ...he played the Raiders, bad defense. Commanders, bad defense. Dolphins, bad defense. And then last week they played the Bears, the worst defense. So is there a chance that we see bad Russ here against the Jets defense?

You must fade any team the week after they score 70 points

I might just put this in my gambling portfolio: any team that scores 70, fade them the next week. If you score 70 points in a game on 71 plays, you can't tell me you don't go into the facility the next day like, 'We're the best, we'll just run the same plays.'

Defense wins championships

Defense wins championships. I'll go to my grave thinking that. The Bucs defense smothered Patrick Mahomes [in the Super Bowl]. That was completely a defensive effort. The Patriots' last Super Bowl was a defensive effort when they stopped the Rams.

The Eagles will beat the Commanders by 25 points

Congrats Max. I'm just going to give it to you. 25 point win for the Eagles this week. The defensive line is going to eat. I blame 40% on the offensive line, 40% on Sam Howell, and then 20% on Tony P in DC.

Jameis Winston is the greatest quarterback in Buccaneers history

Jameis Winston holds all the records for the Bucs. He holds the yards record, the touchdowns record, the completions record. He's the greatest quarterback in Bucs history.

I want Jim Harbaugh to coach the Bears and draft Caleb Williams

I want Caleb Williams. I have said the names Caleb Williams and Jim Harbaugh probably a hundred times in the last four days. I want to bring back man football. Let Jim Harbaugh just stuff all the dorks in Halas Hall into a locker and just go back to being a man football team.

The Chiefs will throttle the Jets because Taylor Swift is attending

Chiefs are going to fucking throttle them. The fact that Taylor Swift is going, the chiefs are going to fucking throttle them. And the chief's defense has not been talked about, has been very good this year.

The Commanders are a Super Bowl team if they beat the Bills in Week 3

If they [Commanders] win this game, I'm almost thinking soupy [Super Bowl] Big Cat. That's how delusional I'm getting. Why not us?

Justin Fields' best effort likely won't be enough for the Bears to beat the Chiefs

I do think they're [Bears] gonna give their best effort, but unfortunately for them, their best effort's probably not gonna be enough [against the Chiefs].

The Bengals will 'right the ship' and beat the Rams in Week 3

I'm gonna take the Bengals minus three. I actually think this is the Bengals week to right the ship. I've been the Bengals whisperer... now's the time.

The Buffalo Bills must win convincingly against the Raiders to get their swagger back

It feels like the Bills have to win this game and they have to win it convincingly to get their swagger back a little bit. It does feel like it's kind of, I don't want to sound the alarm so bad, but the bills just, they need to win. They need to win this game and they need to do it well and they need to win by a lot.

The Bears vs. Bucs game is the biggest in Bears franchise history

I was premature. The Bears going to Tampa Bay is the biggest game in Bears franchise history. I'll just say that right now. I was a week early on my prediction of biggest game in Bears franchise history. This is a must win.

Designated runs for Justin Fields would open up the entire Bears offense

I speak on behalf of America and probably all Bears fans. When I say let Justin Fields run the ball. Let him everything, put in some design runs for him. Let him stretch the defense out. Let them let the defense get uncomfortable and try to figure out where he's gonna go. And then the passing game opens up when you do that.

The Commanders defensive line is better than the Eagles defensive line

The commanders, I think, have a better defensive line than even the Philadelphia Eagles do. Rivera's gonna be on the war path and it's gonna be nice and I think the commanders in that defensive line, which is the best in the NFL across, across all divisions.

The Cardinals defense is sneaky good and they are coached to be a dirty team

I still think that their defense is gonna be pretty good. No, I'm saying that because if you watch the X videos and the Twitter chrome on it Max that defense was headhunting. They, they, they were coached that way. I'm telling you, watch the Cardinals this week. Tell me that they don't take like sneaky violent shots. They're, they're a dirty team.

The Ravens are my Super Bowl pick for this year

I think I'm gonna take the Ravens, but I don't know what their price is right now. I think it's like 22 to one. I think that's gonna be my Super Bowl pick this year.

I'm betting big on Kirk Cousins and the Vikings this year

I went hard on the, on the Vikings. Ooh Vikings. Okay. Feeling a little bad about last year. I'm back. Yeah, I'm back on Kirk Cousins.

CJ Stroud is a risky draft pick because he is an Ohio State quarterback

CJ Stroud is a very good QB. Very, very good. The only thing is that I got against him is that he's an Ohio State quarterback. And how many really great Ohio State quarterbacks we've seen coming out that just haven't really panned out

Bryce Young is too small and has a slender frame that will lead to injuries

I get the Bryce Young hype. I get it. The thing is... you can't put 30 pounds on Bryce Young. His frame is, his frame is just, it does, it's not gonna work. If you look at his frame, he's slender at the shoulders... Because of that, like, he's gonna be more injury prone.

Anthony Richardson is a 'follower' because he copied Will Levis hitting the ceiling at his pro day

Anthony Richardson did it and said that he hit the roof on purpose because Will Levis did it. This is my red flag. I want my quarterback to be a leader, not a follower. Like he was copying someone else. He was like following the lead.

Hendon Hooker will be the best quarterback of the 2023 draft class

Hendon Hooker wins... I think Hendon Hooker has the best combination of falling to a bad spot and having good enough talent to like make it in the long run.

Derek Carr would not work in New York because he is too sensitive to media criticism.

Derek Carr would not work [in New York]. He's too sensitive. He cries, he blocks everybody on Twitter. Like, his excuses wouldn't suffice for the New York [media].

There will be no 'doinks' (hitting the uprights) on any field goal or extra point attempt in the Super Bowl

I'm taking no doinks. The field goal on an R and extra point. If there's a doink, it pays out What? Hank plus 410, 420... I'm no doinks so I'm loading up and I think it's minus 540 on the Barstool Sportsbook.

Total players to attempt a pass in the Super Bowl will be over 2.5

Total players to attempt a pass over two and a half plus one 30. Yeah. And you have the added bonus this year of both quarterbacks being a little dinged up. So that, I mean there's gotta be a trick play.

A player will record an 'Octopus' (scoring a TD and the following 2-point conversion) in the Super Bowl

I also like this one... there to be an octopus. Yes. Plus 1150. I'm going, yes. An octopus is a player scoring a touchdown and then scoring the next play, two point conversion.

I am betting $8,500 on the Eagles to be a good friend to Big Cat

I've decided, I'm going... I need to be a good friend. Would a good friend root against his buddy to lose $200,000? No... So I've decided... I'll put 8,500 on the Eagles.

Kadarius Toney will score a touchdown against the Bengals

I think Kadarius Toney's gonna score in this game. Reid's gonna break out some weird trick play that we haven't seen before... it's gonna be like, 'Kadarius Toney, the reason why we brought you here is you're a difference maker. Go do it.'

The Bills will blow out the Dolphins and cover a 13-point spread

I would take the Bills even if they were like minus 17 at this point. ... It's gonna be an ass kicking. It's gonna be a whomping. The bills are gonna go up and down the field. Skylar Thompson. I just, yeah, that's all you gotta say.

The Giants (+3) will beat the Vikings because the Vikings are frauds

Giants plus three NFC Beast baby. ... I think their defense is gonna fail them and Brian Daboll and... the Wink Martindale defensive scheme is gonna fluster Kirk Cousins. ... Wild card hosts that missed the playoffs last year are 12 and 28 against the spread.

The Buccaneers will cover +2.5 against the Cowboys because Tom Brady doesn't lose to Dak Prescott in the playoffs

Bucks plus two and a half. ... It's Tom Brady v Dak Prescott. I've said this before, but when you have moments like this, there's, you can make a bet and if you're wrong you can live with it. ... But if you bet the Cowboys... and you're wrong then you say, I bet Dak Prescott versus Tom Brady in a playoff game. You feel like the biggest idiot of all time.

Tom Brady has won the Super Bowl every other year since 2013

Tom Brady's won the Super Bowl every other year since 2013. [2014, 2016, 2018, 2020].

The Cowboys win-loss pattern suggests they will win four in a row and become Super Bowl champions

Cowboys win loss pattern. They've lost the game one four in a row. Lost the game one, two in a row, lost the game, won four in a row, lost the game one, two in a row, they just lost to the commanders. ... that would imply that they're gonna win four in a row, which would make them Super Bowl champions.

The Titans will stay within 20 points of the Cowboys because there's no tape on Josh Dobbs

I put a pft on this game that I'm, I'm sure that it's gonna win because it's Titans Plus 20. Right. They're gonna keep within 20. Josh Dobbs. Sure. There's no tape on Josh Dobbs.

The Giants -5.5 is the easiest bet of the year because the Colts are the worst-coached team in the league

My favorite favorite is the Giants minus five and a half. So. Watching them Monday night. Easiest bet I had all year was the Chargers. They're, they're the worst coach team in the league. They're terrible. They can't score points, they can't do anything. The Giants are fighting for a playoff spot.

Eliminated teams playing teams that need to win in the final weeks are a 63% ATS betting lock

The eliminated teams playing teams that need to win over the final two weeks of this season are 63% against the spread since 1990. So essentially any team that needs to win and you're playing a dead dog team, it just always, it, it, it usually works out that the dead dog team's a little livelier than people realize.

The 'candy ass' Dolphins will suck against the Patriots because they are playing in the cold

Patriots minus three. No Tua going up North. Candy ass Dolphin suck.

I would rather watch the playoffs fan-free than have the Patriots make it just to get smoked

Honestly, I know I have to watch these games anyway. I would rather just watch the playoffs completely fan free because I know it's get my hopes up and be like, oh, you know, I have to worry about and like, kind of put myself up for them winning. Even though if they won the first game, they're getting smoked the second game. They're probably getting smoked the first game.

Mac Jones is a dirty player

I think that was a, a cheap shock going at his Eli Apple's ankles for sure. He's had some dirty plays.

The Jets are a good team with Mike White and a bad team with Zach Wilson

I'm back on the Jets. Mike White. I really do think that they're, they're actually a good team with Mike White. They're such a bad team with Zach Wilson. I think the defense will get like a, you know, juiced up from it. I, the Seahawks have been very, very bad.

Lane Johnson is a warrior and will be 100% back for the playoffs after choosing not to have surgery

Lane Johnson is pretty important... He has confirmed that he will be back for the playoffs... He's choosing not to get surgery so that he can, he can 100%. He's a warrior.

Tom Brady will end up in Las Vegas or Miami next season

Las Vegas feels like Tom Brady would want to go out there and finish his career there. Now they've got McDaniels out there, they're cutting their quarterback or trading their quarterback. And if you're a divorced man in your forties. Yep. What city do you want? ... He, he either go to Miami.

The Packers being 3.5-point favorites over the 12-3 Vikings is the biggest trap of all time; Green Bay will win and cover

The Minnesota Vikings plus three and a half in Lambeau. This game scares me. I want the Vikings to win... They're not gonna win. The Packers are gonna win. And they're probably gonna cover, because similar to the Lions game a few weeks ago, the Vikings are 12 and three and they're playing, it's a seven and eight team and they're three and a half point underdogs. That seems like the biggest trap of all time.

Bills-Bengals is the best Monday Night Football game of all time based on records

I am so fucking excited for this game. Yes. It's, it's I think the best Monday night football game of all time considering the records of the teams playing in it.

JJ Watt is a better football player than he is a person

He was a much better player? Yes. He was like one of the top three all-time players... He has three defensive player of the year awards Only one man of the year award. So I'd say he's a better, the stats don't lie. He's a better player than he is a person.

The Bengals will beat the Patriots because Matt Patricia is a demoralizing coordinator

This is entirely the Patriots. Our joke, there's season's over demoralized. Matt Patricia's still the offensive coordinator. ... So why not just fire him now? ... it literally cannot [get] worse.

The Saints and Browns will go over the 32-point total despite historically bad weather

I'm going lowest to the low. Ground Saints 32. Deshaun Watson unders have been the easiest bet since he started three, three easy unders. He's due for an over. And weather doesn't matter.

I will give Billy $10,000 if the Buccaneers beat the Cardinals 14-12 exactly

I will give you $10,000 if that's what happens in this case... 14 or 15 to 12 Bucks. Beat the Cardinals. Yes. For $20,000. Christmas.

The Eagles will whomp the Bears

My favorite favorite is the Philadelphia Eagles. Ooh. Against the Bears. Yeah. This gonna be a whomping. I think it's gonna be a Whomping. Their minus nine. But you know, they've proven themselves... The bears are, are and rightfully show as they should be. Like they're tanking. Like they don't wanna win. They don't want to fight.

I'm betting the Bills -7 over the Dolphins because Tua Tagovailoa can't play in the cold

I had no idea they went to seven, Tua has played 63 games in college and pro and never started a game that's been under 36 degrees. Yep... He's not a cold weather guy... This is going to be a big time fish outta water studio. Yes. And he also, he started three games with the temperatures under 50 degrees. Oh three straight up and against the spread... Bill's my seven, my pick.

Zach Wilson has been working on his fundamentals and he might be back

I do think Mike White's gonna get the wind though. Big time with Zach Wilson being QB two now. I know. So there's a little fire underneath him... And he's been working on his fundamentals.