Takes

DK Metcalf's last-place track finish was both impressive and embarrassing

DK Metcalf was impressive, and then at the same time he got embarrassed. It's weird because he was way better than I thought he would be, but he also was not even close to as fast as the fastest guys.

I am not an NFL caliber kicker unless I make a team

I'm definitely not an NFL caliber guy. I know that... I am not an NFL caliber kicker unless I make an NFL team, at which point I am an NFL caliber kicker. There is zero part of my brain that thinks that I'm a professional caliber kicker... half a percent.

March Madness makes you want to play basketball more than any other event

I would say my number one would be March Madness always makes me want to go play hoops. Something about March Madness makes basketball more romantic, so you just want to go play it and relive Valpo and all this shit.

Michael Jordan is the absolute definition of a 'winner', despite his flaws as an owner

Michael Jordan is not a loser... he is the definition of the word winner? Yes. Yeah, I would say so in like sees synonymous with winner more probably any athlete.

Tennis balls are definitely green

I already know the answer to it. No, they're green... Yeah, they're probably green. They're definitely green.

Tennis balls are yellow

You think they're yellow. Interesting... I don't go with the sheep.

Being hungry is much better than being thirsty

I would rather be hungry than thirsty because I feel like if you are properly hydrated, like you're okay. You can survive for a very long time... I love being hungry because it means I haven't eaten, so I'm feeling kind of skinny.

The 2012-13 Lakers with Steve Nash and Dwight Howard was the most stacked team of all time on paper

That team, though, the Steve Nash, Dwight Howard team, that's my favorite Lakers team of all time... When that cover came out, it was like, who the fuck would beat the Lakers? ... When that happened, I was like, oh, my God. This is the most stacked team of all time.

MJ is the greatest of all time

As much as I obviously don't want to get in the debate because I obviously everyone knows where I stand. MJ, greatest of all time.

Lane Kiffin is thinking too hard

Lane's thinking too hard. Let's just say that. He's thinking a little too hard.

Ezekiel Elliott is eating cereal, not soup, in his 'feed me' celebration

I saw somebody say, look at Ezekiel Elliott eating that cereal... he does his little soup celebration every time he gets some yards. I thought it's soup. Nope. It's cereal.