PMT DB
PMT DB
Joey Chestnut on Competitive Eating, Human Flesh, and the Nathan's 100th
July is officially here, which usually means the sports world is a wasteland, but Big Cat has a date with destiny at Coney Island. Preparation for the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest is reaching a fever pitch, even if Big Cat’s training regimen mostly involved PFT Commenter trying to stuff dogs down his throat while he did sit-ups. While the experts aren't exactly bullish on a rookie performance, the confidence level in the studio is high.
Big CatI will eat at least 10 hot dogs in the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest
I am going to get double digits. It's going to shock the world. People are going to be like, you know what? All I want is I'm not going to win the contest. But I want at the end of the contest for whoever the Todd McShay, Mel Kiper of the hot dog eating world is to be like, here's a riser for next year, guys. Watch out for him.
PFT Commenter isn't buying the hype, setting a line that suggests Big Cat might be more of a "snacker" than a "competitor" on the big stage.
PFT CommenterBig Cat will fail to hit double digits in the hot dog contest; the over-under should be 7.5
I'd be shocked if you hit double digits. I would say that the over-under should be set at about seven and a half.
Competitive Eating Royalty
To get some actual professional insight, the legendary Joey Chestnut joined the show to discuss reclaiming his title from Matt Stoney. Joey is in a different headspace this year, admitting that losing last year was "obnoxious" and forced him to actually start running and working out again to find his speed. He also confirmed that the competitive eating world is surprisingly friendly, noting that he and Stoney live within five miles of each other and grab drinks, a far cry from the bitter Kobayashi era.
Things took a turn for the macabre when the conversation shifted from hot dogs to hypothetical high-stakes purses. When asked if he’d consume a very specific, nicely seasoned type of protein for an eight-figure payday, Joey didn't blink.
Joey ChestnutI would eat cooked human flesh for $10 million
[PFT asks about eating human flesh for $10 million] I could do it. I would do it in a country where it wasn't illegal... It would be like we get a scientific permit to do it.
Beyond the hypothetical cannibalism, Joey also proved he’s an elite athlete in any arena, claiming he could dominate the PMT staple Milk Mile without breaking a sweat.
Joey ChestnutI can chug a gallon of milk and run a mile in 10 minutes
[PFT asks if he could do the milk mile] Yeah, I could do that. I wouldn't run that quickly, but I'd probably finish right about 10 minutes.
Baseball and the Man Card
In actual sports news, Clayton Kershaw is heading to the shelf, and Big Cat has some thoughts on the southpaw's choice of treatment. Apparently, using medical advancements typically reserved for the maternity ward doesn't sit well with the Grit Week sensibilities of the show.
Big CatClayton Kershaw loses his man card for getting an epidural
I saw that Clayton Kershaw had an epidural. So I'm going to take his man card. Yeah, chicks get epidurals. Right. I don't even know what – I had to ask you before the show what exactly is an epidural because I thought it was something to do with childbirth, which it is. But I guess Clayton Kershaw – is Clayton Kershaw pregnant?
The guys also checked in on foul ball aficionado Zach Hample, who had a rough night at the ballpark getting hit in the face and boxed out of catches. PFT Commenter questioned if Hample has the clutch gene, while Big Cat defended his guy, noting that being within a few feet of two home runs in one night is a victory in itself.
NBA Free Agency and Mount Rushmore
With free agency looming, the speculation is running wild. PFT Commenter is convinced Kobe Bryant is looking for a "cultured" landing spot or perhaps just heading to a different locker room in the same building.
PFT CommenterKobe Bryant is considering the Knicks, Celtics, Spurs, Raptors, or Clippers in free agency
I think this is the best-kept secret in free agency so far is what teams is Kobe Bryant taking meetings with? I think he's going to the Knicks, the Celtics, the Spurs or the Raptors? Kobe's a big foreign guy. He's cultured. I think he might want to spend some time up north... [Big Cat suggests Clippers] Yeah, he's probably taking a meeting with them. Yeah. Kobe going to LA.
Big Cat, meanwhile, is keeping his eyes on the bigger fish, predicting a quiet return for the league's most coveted prize before the secondary sweepstakes begin.
Big CatKevin Durant will re-sign with the Oklahoma City Thunder
Kevin Durant taking meetings. He's going to end up at Oklahoma City.
The debut of Mount Rushmore season kicked off with Picnic Sides. Big Cat stayed traditional with potato salad and baked beans, while PFT Commenter declared war on a summer staple.
PFT CommenterColeslaw is trash
Dude, coleslaw is trash... everybody puts them on their plate, but they don't eat them.
Hank rounded out the segment with some truly bizarre choices, including "chaser buns" and chicken salad, which the guys accurately pointed out sounds like a Fourth of July spent at a Whole Foods in Nantucket.
Segments and Jimbos
PR 101 touched on Johnny Manziel’s recent suspension, which Big Cat views as a masterstroke in staying relevant during a summer of sobriety.
Big CatJohnny Manziel's NFL suspension is a PR victory because it keeps him relevant
He got suspended by the NFL for four games. And you know what? That's a great thing for him to have happen because Johnny Manziel, for the first time in a few months, is being talked about in the same sentence as the NFL... It's all good news when the NFL is suspending you because that means you still have a little bit of relevancy.
Olympic Update highlighted the increasingly terrifying news coming out of Rio, with Big Cat theorizing that the body parts washing up on shore are actually just a very aggressive marketing campaign to make sure people remember the games are happening.
Jimbos of the week featured a listener who accidentally used fabric softener as detergent and broke out in hives, and Hank's latest automotive disaster involving a thousand-dollar car that is currently a rolling fire hazard. PFT Commenter shared his own Jimbo regarding a "potty training" relapse that involved an alarm clock and a keyboard, reminding everyone that we're all slow learners in this life.
Big Cat will be at the end of the table on July 4th, likely questioning every life choice that led him to that moment.
