PMT DB
PMT DB
Pete Prisco on NFL Playoffs, Max Duggan, and the 2022 Bonk List
The show opens with a heavy heart as Big Cat and PFT reflect on the terrifying scenes involving Damar Hamlin on Monday Night Football. It was a moment where the sports world truly stood still, and the guys give credit where it’s due to the medical staff and coaches like Sean McDermott and Zac Taylor who prioritized a man’s life over a game. Once the air is cleared, the show transitions back to the studio to provide the distraction and brevity we all probably needed.
Landing Planes and Saving the Planet
Hot Seat/Cool Throne gets moving with some truly unhinged confidence from PFT. After seeing a study about who could land a plane in an emergency, PFT has decided that years of sitting in economy have prepared him for the cockpit of a 737. He’s not worried about the technicalities of landing gear or air traffic control; he’s got the "air science" down.
PFT CommenterI could land a commercial airliner if the pilot became incapacitated
If I got behind the wheel or what the stick of a 737 and I was able to talk to air traffic control, I honestly do believe that I would be able to land a plane. It's pretty simple stuff. It's not rocket science, it's air science.
Not content with just being a pilot, PFT also pivoted into a full-blown environmentalist, arguing that his stature is actually a gift to the earth. If we want to save the planet, we apparently just need to be significantly smaller humans who consume fewer BTUs and eat less food.
PFT CommenterShort people are crucial for conserving food and resources on our dying planet
Being short is better for the future... Not only do shorter people tend to live longer, but they're also crucial in conserving food and resources on her dying planet. The short are also inherent conservationists, which is more crucial than ever in this world of 8 billion. So basically if we were 10% shorter, we would save 87 millions of tons of food per year.
Meanwhile, Billy Football has gone full Treasure Hunter. He claims there is a literal fortune sitting in the East River in the form of wooly mammoth tusks and ancient ivory. He even gave out the specific coordinates on East 65th Street, essentially inviting every listener with a wetsuit and a dream to go scuba diving in NYC sludge.
Billy FootballThere are wooly mammoth bones and ivory worth millions in the East River
There's a bunch of treasure in the East River... wooly mammoth bones, tusks, ivory. It's treasure. Millions. Billions. The treasure is on East 65th Street next to the FDR Drive in the water... we're gonna try to go get it.
Pete Prisco and the Playoff Picture
Our good friend Pete Prisco joins the program to break down the final week of the season and the upcoming playoffs. Prisco remains the world's leading authority on "making your damn kicks" and hating special teams as a concept. He believes that while everyone is obsessed with hidden yardage, the reality of the game is much simpler: kick it out of the end zone and find a game-wrecker on defense.
Pete PriscoSpecial teams only account for 14% of a football game
It's not a third of the game either. It's a great myth. It's about 14% of the game. Punt the ball out of bounds. Kick the ball out of the end zone. Don't worry about any of that return crap... Make your damn kicks. It's your only damn job.
Prisco is also fully bought into the Trevor Lawrence ascension. After the disaster that was the Urban Meyer era—which Prisco labels the worst in league history—he sees the Jaguars as a legitimate problem for the AFC. He’s so confident in the Jags' momentum that he’s already booking their travel for the Saturday afternoon wildcard slot, a tradition for the AFC South.
Pete PriscoThe Jaguars are guaranteed to play in the Saturday afternoon wildcard window
I'll tell you what, they're not that great on defense. ... Guaranteed Jacksonville plays the early game first game in the wildcard round. I went back and looked since 2010. The AFC South champ or team has played in that spot every year except one.
When the conversation shifts to the NFC, Prisco isn't buying the Vikings' hype, sticking to his guns that Kirk Cousins and company are frauds. Instead, he’s looking toward the Bay Area, though Big Cat thinks the 49ers are so loaded they don't even need a name-brand quarterback to win it all.
Big CatThe 49ers are talented enough to beat any team in the NFL with a generic fourth-string quarterback
I think the 49ers are built to the point where they could beat any team in the NFL [with] the fourth string quarterback that you select and it's just the silhouette of a gray head. As long as that gray head doesn't turn the ball over... I think the 49ers are built to the point where they could beat any team.
National Championship Vibes and The Bonk List
TCU quarterback Max Duggan stops by for one question ahead of the biggest game of his life against Georgia. The guys discuss the power of the Hypnotoad and whether Max is ready to claim his throne as the premier ginger in college football history. If the Frogs pull off the upset, the redheaded legacy of Andy Dalton might finally be eclipsed.
If TCU wins the National Championship, I will be the greatest redheaded college football player of all time
Are you the best red-headed college football player of all time? ... Andy Dalton might... he went to TCU and he was a legend. ... [PFT]: I think if you win this game, there can be no more debate. You are him. [Duggan]: That would be something special.
To wrap things up, Hank finally unveils the long-awaited 2022 Bonk List. It’s a year's worth of horny takes, accidental double entendres, and PFT’s obsession with coaches' wives. From Big Cat wanting to fuck queso to PFT’s detailed requests for Taco Bell breakfast items to treat him poorly, the list is a reminder that this show is never more than five minutes away from a "bonk" at any given time.
Watch out for the Frogs on Monday, but mostly watch out for Big Cat’s abs by Super Bowl week.
