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Paul Bissonnette Talking Hockey And Guys On Chicks, Celtics & Grizzlies Win & Hot Seat Cool Throne

Wednesday, May 4, 202225 takes

Great night in playoffs. We start with Celtics beating the Bucks and the Grizzlies evening the series with the Warriors plus a dumb rule for flagrant fouls. Hockey talk and the Caps are back plus the soul sucking feeling of losing in triple OT. Hot Seat/Cool Throne. Our dear friend Paul Bissonnette aka BizNasty joins the show to talk about the Stanley Cup Playoffs, becoming best friends with Wayne Gretzky, who he has winning it all and more. Biz sticks around for a very special edition of guys on chicks.

BizNasty on Stanley Cup Predictions, Guys on Chicks, and Playoff Recaps

The vibes are high because the Many Womping is officially back on. After a shaky Game 1 that had Hank seeing nightmares in his sleep, the Celtics responded by turning the Bucks into a highlight reel of three-pointers and defensive clamps. Big Cat and PFT break down the absolute beatdown in Boston, which saw Jaylen Brown and Al Horford looking like world-beaters while Giannis Antetokounmpo was left trying to carry the load alone.

Win
May 4, 2022
#17287
HankHank

The 'Many Womping' is officially back on for the Celtics

I was worried... but from my sources on the ground, inside the building, they said Grant Williams walked up to Giannis [Antetokounmpo]... the Many Womping is still backing up. I feel back. Many Womping back on.

The Celtics defeated the Bucks in the series 4-3 and advanced to the Finals, largely proving Hank's optimism correct.

While the Celtics looked dominant, Big Cat is quick to remind everyone that this is far from over. Both these teams are too talented for a sweep, and the counterpunch from Milwaukee is coming once they head back to the Fiserv Forum.

Win
May 4, 2022
#23902
Big CatBig Cat

The Celtics vs. Bucks series is going to go seven games

I think we all set it on Sunday when the [Bucks] won game one, we're like, this is going to be a seven games series. Both these teams are really, really good. And you expected an answer like this from the Celtics tonight because they're a really fucking good team.

The series did indeed go seven games, with the Celtics winning Game 7 to advance.

Over in the Western Conference, Ja Morant reminded everyone why he is the most electric player in the league right now. The Grizzlies evened things up with the Warriors in a game that felt more like a street fight than a basketball game. Between Dillon Brooks getting ejected for a hit on Gary Payton II and everyone on the court seemingly getting poked in the eye, the intensity has reached a boiling point. Big Cat even proposed a new way to officiate these high-stakes games based on the sacred laws of the blacktop.

Void
May 4, 2022
#17288
Big CatBig Cat

The NBA should judge flagrant fouls by whether the play would start a fight in a pickup game

I basically judge flagrant fouls. Would this foul start a fight in a pickup basketball game? That one [Dillon Brooks on Gary Payton II] would have started a fight instantly. Instantly. Not everyone who's played pickup basketball knows there's a difference.

This is a subjective standard for officiating.

BizNasty in Studio

Our good friend Paul Bissonnette, better known as BizNasty, joined the show to dive deep into the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Biz is currently balancing his time between the Spittin' Chiclets empire and his new gig on TNT, where he’s becoming best friends with Wayne Gretzky. He gave us the lowdown on the Maple Leafs' chances and why he thinks the back-to-back champion Lightning might finally be running out of gas.

Loss
May 4, 2022
#17311
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

The Tampa Bay Lightning are 'fucked out' and will lose to the Maple Leafs

I just think they're fucked out. You know, when you just been fucking all night long and finally it's 6:00 AM and the sun's coming up and you're like, I'm blowing dust. They went back-to-back, man. A lot of hockey. Your central nervous system can only handle so much. I think that the Tampa Bay Lightning are done.

The Lightning beat the Leafs in 7 games and went on to reach their third straight Stanley Cup Final. They were definitely not 'done'.

Biz didn't stop there, breaking down why Cale Makar is essentially a glitch in the Matrix for opposing defenses and which teams have the depth to actually survive the gauntlet that is the NHL postseason. While he loves the parody of the league, he's leaning toward a heavyweight battle for the final.

Push
May 4, 2022
#17313
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

The Stanley Cup Final will be Colorado vs. Florida and it will be the most electric ever

I think this is a year where the favorites get to the top. I think it's going to be Colorado and I think it's going to be Florida. And I think it will be the most electric Stanley Cup Final of all time... both of those teams are extremely fun to watch.

Colorado made it and won, but Florida was swept in the second round by Tampa Bay. The matchup did not happen.

He also gave us some incredible behind-the-scenes insight into the coaching style of Daryl Sutter in Calgary. Apparently, if you're a player on the Flames, you better hope your family planning doesn't interfere with the chase for the Cup, because Sutter is not a fan of distractions.

Void
May 4, 2022
#23908
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

Daryl Sutter doesn't want the distraction of players having children during the season

If you want to be on [Daryl] Sutter's bad side, you would have a kid born in the midst of the season. If you knock up your wife and she's gonna give birth during the course of the season, you might as well just fucking ask for a tray [trade]. He takes it away and doesn't want, he doesn't want any distractions.

Hot Seat/Cool Throne

Hank kicked off Hot Seat with a legendary rant against Yankees announcer John Sterling. After another series of calls where Sterling seemed to be watching a completely different game, Hank is calling for the legend to hang it up before he ruins his own legacy by being blind in the booth.

Push
HankHank

John Sterling has become a parody of himself and needs to retire from the Yankees booth

My hot seat is John Sterling. I think this is a bit at this point... [Sterling] is blind. For the third time, it wasn't even close. He needs to quickly make the decision so he can say that he's retiring and everyone can just praise him so that he doesn't have to deal with what's going to probably happen a few more times.

John Sterling continued broadcasting through the 2023 season before eventually retiring in early 2024.

Big Cat moved to the Hot Seat with a literal pain in the balls, noting the staggering amount of nut shots occurring in the NBA playoffs. From Robert Williams to Luka Doncic, no one is safe. He argued that the physical toll of a kick to the groin is vastly underrated by the general public.

Void
Big CatBig Cat

Getting hit in the nuts is worse than childbirth

Women don't realize that childbirth is not that hard when you've gotten hit in the nuts. Your balls feel like they're going to explode and your stomach feels like it's going to cave inside of itself. It's like having all of your periods at once.

Biologically impossible to definitively prove, but a frequent comedic claim.

Finally, the guys checked in on the Cincinnati Reds, who are off to a historically bad start. Things have gotten so bleak in Cincy that fans are resorting to some pretty extreme measures of protest involving the stadium’s iconic Toyota Tundra.

Win
Big CatBig Cat

Reds fans should defecate in the Toyota Tundra at the stadium to protest the owner

A Reds fan posted yesterday saying... 'I will be scaling the wall to defecate in the bed of the Toyota Tundra.' I just liked that Reds fans are fighting back. This is how you fight... maybe it will make people go shit in their trucks.

A fan actually did get arrested for this later in the season, proving the take 'correct' that this was a path fans would take.

We wrapped things up with a very special edition of Guys on Chicks featuring Biz, where we learned way too much about Canadian bedroom preferences and why everyone needs to be careful about what names they shout out in the heat of the moment.

Don't forget to buy the Canelo fight this weekend through our link so you can hear us call the action live from Vegas.

nflnba-playoffsstanley-cupbiznastycelticsgrizzlieshockey

More Takes

Win
May 4, 2022
#23903
Big CatBig Cat

The betting line for Bucks-Celtics Game 2 was a 'total trap'

I actually like looked at the line beforehand and I was smart enough to be like the [Bucks] is a total trap. Do not bet the [Bucks]... I knew right away, I was like, that's pretty much the same line as Sunday after the [Bucks] beat them pretty soundly. That makes no sense.

The Celtics won comfortably and covered the spread, confirming the 'trap' for Bucks bettors.
Void
May 4, 2022
#23904
Big CatBig Cat

Nike ruined NBA jerseys because every team has too many versions

Nike ruined NBA jerseys. Cause there's like, every team has 15 jerseys and they all wear like these weird jerseys. We talked about this last year. Remember when the [Heat] were just wearing the Pacers jerseys, they just ruined it. They, each team should have at most four jerseys.

Loss
May 4, 2022
#17289
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The NBA should introduce a 'Flagrant 3' where the victim's team gets to pick a player on the other team to be kicked out

That should be a Flagrant 3. And if there's a Flagrant 3, here's the rule. The other team, they get to pick which one of your guys is kicked out of the game. Or you could take that player's dad. So Gary Payton comes back and plays for your team the next round.

The NBA has not and will not introduce a 'Flagrant 3' with these rules.
Void
May 4, 2022
#17290
Big CatBig Cat

Ja Morant hovers in the air and time moves slower when he's around the basket

Ja Morant, I like, he just hovers. I don't understand it. He doesn't, he jumps up and he just doesn't come down. He does like six moves in the air. Time moves slower when he's in there. It's almost like they've already planned out the four things they're going to do in the air before they actually put the ball up.

Subjective appreciation of elite athleticism.
Void
May 4, 2022
#17292
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

LeBron James is living the college sorority life he never got on social media

I love LeBron James on social media, man. He's basically living the college sorority life that he never got to because he went straight to the NBA. Between his emoji game and then the egregious amount of Instagram stories that he puts up. This guy is no different than like a 22-year-old.

Subjective comparison of social media habits.
Loss
May 4, 2022
#17294
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I'm 79% of the way back to declaring the Capitals are going to win the Cup again

I'm having a hard time believing in these Caps as of eight hours ago. Right now I'm almost fully back. I'm like 79% of the way back to declaring that these Caps are different. That these Caps—it's our year again.

The Capitals lost the series to the Panthers in 6 games.
Void
May 4, 2022
#17296
Big CatBig Cat

Losing a triple-overtime game at home is the worst feeling in sports

There's no worse feeling than having committing six hours of your time into a hockey game and coming away with absolutely nothing. It sucks the soul right out of you. And it was against the backup goalie too.

Subjective ranking of sports pain.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

It's impossible to tell if Hue Jackson was intentionally throwing games or just being Hue Jackson

The NFL just conducted an investigation to Hue Jackson's claims that he was paid to throw games and they concluded that. No, it's literally impossible to tell whether or not Hue Jackson was intentionally losing games or if he was just being Hue Jackson, since there's such a big body of work behind them to establish the fact that this is what Hue Jackson does.

Loss
Big CatBig Cat

NBA players who get hit in the nuts should get a free shot to kick the offender back

If you get a flagrant one, you should get to kick the guy in the balls back in center court. How awesome would that be for fans? Tonight, I might see a guy just get smoked in the nuts.

The NBA will never implement a 'kick back' rule.
Push
Billy FootballBilly Football

High taxes in Minnesota and Canada prevent their NHL teams from landing top free agents

My cool throne is Minnesota and Canada. The reason why they can't land good free agents to make their hockey teams good is because of taxes.

While taxes are a factor, things like the 'No-Movement Clause' and team success often outweigh them. However, many players do avoid high-tax areas.
Push
May 4, 2022
#23905
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

The Florida Panthers are the deepest team in the NHL with four 'unreal' lines

Florida Panthers who [have] four unreal lines of authentic driving forwards, a great backend... they just got Aaron Ekblad back... they also have that one-two punch [in goal]... they have been a wagon all year. I have a lot of trust on them.

While they had the best regular season record, the Panthers were swept in the second round by the Lightning, casting doubt on their 'wagon' status in the playoffs.
Win
May 4, 2022
#17312
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

Cale Makar is the next Paul Coffey and the best defenseman in the world

Cale Makar is easily the next Paul Coffey. We hadn't seen a defenseman who's able to drive traffic like him. He's essentially stepped in as the Connor McDavid of the back end. He's probably going to score 30 goals as a defenseman. He is just a freak of nature.

Makar won the Norris Trophy and Conn Smythe in 2022, confirming he was indeed the best defenseman that year.
Loss
May 4, 2022
#23906
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

The St. Louis Blues are a dark horse to win the West after adding Nick Leddy

Let's go St. Louis out of the west... they got Leddy, which not a huge name, but it just filled a hole. And ever since then, they've just been on this massive roll... they were winning 80% of their games, if not more.

The Blues beat the Wild in the first round but were eliminated by the Avalanche in the second round.
Loss
May 4, 2022
#17314
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

The NHL should use a 1-8 seeding draft where the top seeds pick their opponents

I would be okay if they ended up switching the patterns up. It would be the first seed selecting, starting with the first team, they would pick their opponent and then all the way through. I definitely think they should go back one through eight... and then reseed after the first round.

The NHL has not changed its playoff format to a selection/draft system.
Loss
May 4, 2022
#23907
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

This season is the 'Last Dance' for the Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, and Kris Letang trio in Pittsburgh

I think this is the last dance... this'll be the group's last time together. They're, you know how they had the one for about this is their, they got that trio. I just don't know with the cap, if they're going to be able to afford all three of them, cause Letang and Malkin are up for contracts.

Despite the cap concerns, all three players eventually re-signed and remained teammates through the 2023-24 season and beyond.
Void
May 4, 2022
#23909
Paul BissonnettePaul Bissonnette

Every professional sport should have an Emergency Backup Player (EBUG) rule like hockey

I feel like every sport should have this [EBUG situation]... For, for football would be the kicker... I'd love to see a random dude out on a basketball court. Just like get blown by and like not, not even be able to dribble... Usually once a year, a guy, a regular Joe off the street gets addressed in NHL game.


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