The Suns are officially dead

Suns are cooked, absolutely cooked. We're calling it. This game. Sons are cooked, absolutely cooked. ... I've never seen in credit to the Mavs. ... It's a combo of like the Mavs playing great, but also the Suns forgetting how to like touch a basketball.

Chris Paul is a fraud

I'm going to call it right now. I'm going to use a hard D-bomb. What's that? Hank? A fraud. ... Chris Paul is literally the best NBA player of all time that has sucked.

The Celtics will beat the Heat in five or six games

I do think the Celtics are a better team. Like I think this should be a five or six game series. And I just, you know, Heat culture all that shit, but that was, you know, even the bubble, like the Celtics team is a much different team than they were in the bubble. They're way better.

Technically Vanny Woodhead does not exist and is legally destroyed

Technically it's destroyed. Legally it's chopped up. But I kind of, I couldn't, I didn't have the heart to chop it up, so I just been keeping it. No, one [owns it]. The, it's technically like scrap. It's a ghost car. It just hasn't been scrapped.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes

Come on, Zach Wilson, his ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes. That's a fact. If he plays to the best of his ability.

Al-Qaeda is the only one who could have written the Monday Night Football script

Running out with the flag... hard knocks... there was so much hope and hype. And, you know, talking about the NFL script, the only one who could have written that script is Al-Qaeda.