The college basketball chaos on Saturday was triggered by Fran McCaffrey's stare down with the referee

I think Saturday we got the chaos all because of Fran McCaffrey's stare down. It was from that point on the day, just went off the fucking rails. There's nothing like a good old fashioned coach just staring at a referee so close and neither one of them was gonna walk away.

MLB pitch velocity will decrease by 0.02 mph this year due to the new shot clock rules

This guy Corky knows his shit. He is projecting right now an average decrease in pitch velocity this year of 0.02 miles per hour. Whoa. Because the new shot clock rules. So yeah, keep that in the back pocket. We're gonna see slower fastballs this year.

Keith Hernandez has toxoplasmosis from his cat, which is why he's messing up player names

Keith Hernandez has toxoplasmosis from living with his cat. Oh. That's why he's messing up names. But I mean, is it really a mess up? Because Chaz Chisholm [Jazz Chisholm] is just a Hall of fame name.

I lied about destroying Vanny Woodhead; I have been keeping it for years

Technically it's destroyed. Legally it's chopped up. But I kind of... I didn't have the heart to chop it up, so I just been keeping it... I was like, every time it was an excuse I used to not follow through with chopping it up.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes

Come on, Zach Wilson, his ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes. That's a fact. If he plays to the best of his ability.

Al-Qaeda is the only one who could have written the Monday Night Football script

Running out with the flag... hard knocks... there was so much hope and hype. And, you know, talking about the NFL script, the only one who could have written that script is Al-Qaeda.