Dak Prescott is not worth $40 million per year

I don't think he's worth 40 million dollars. And I think that you probably have to sit down, Dak, and be like, dude, I know that you want this much money, but would you rather this much money or maybe win a Super Bowl with the Dallas Cowboys?

The Cowboys should pay Dak Prescott $75 million per year

As not a Dallas Cowboys fan, I hope they pay Dak as much money as possible. 70. 75. Okay. Fuck it. Deal. Full send.

Michael Porter Jr.'s spine is made of dust

My hot seat is Michael Porter Jr. You guys remember him? Remember he's in the NBA? Has yet to play a minute. His spine is made of dust.

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?