March usually has 30 days, but this year it had 31 just to punish us for the lack of basketball

March was awful... You cannot convince me that March is normally 31 days. That's your shit. March is usually 30 and this year it was 31 just like twist that knife and to be like, there's no basketball, there's nothing going on.

Dana White being forced to cancel UFC events makes me very nervous about the return of sports

The UFC canceling their next pay-per-view is making me scared... when Dana White has to adhere to the rules makes me a little nervous.

Bill Belichick won't care about Gronk leaving; he will just view it as getting a draft pick for nothing

There's not a single person better equipped to have like two of his star players leave him willingly than Bill Belichick... He'll probably get a great draft pick for and just keep moving on like not even think about... he would absolutely get something for nothing because Rob's not coming back to play.

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?