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Bert KreischerBert Kreischer

Tom Segura is going to die in a car accident because he drives like a '16-year-old asshole.'

I did not wanna die in a car accident with Tom [Segura]. And that is how that guy's gonna die. Yeah. Well that is how that guy's gonna die. Well he drives like a fucking asshole, like a 16 year old asshole. He knows the pedals that he never uses? Yeah, he fucking uses them.

The outcome has not happened yet; Tom Segura is still alive.

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Loss
Feb 20, 2023
#8816
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I have the golf bug now and I'm a 'big-time pro' after my vacation to Mexico.

I played a little golf. I'm a big time pro now. I got the bug. I got the golf bug. That's my big takeaway. Same. You let me take one vacation and and play golf for about six hours. And all of a sudden I'm like fully in, fully back in on golf.

PFT is not actually a professional golfer.
Void
Feb 20, 2023
#8817
Billy FootballBilly Football

Christian Yelich looks like Jackson Mahomes

I got a vacation take. Taking a thought of over vacation. Okay. Christian Yelich. Looks like Jackson Mahomes.

Purely subjective visual opinion.
Win
Feb 20, 2023
#8818
Big CatBig Cat

Mac McClung is a legend and saved the dunk contest

Mac McClung has saved it. Philly finally has a championship shout out title town... Mack McClung, like it was legitimately, I watched it... The lead up to the dunk contest, he was guaranteeing that he was gonna put on a show and then he put it on and everyone's like, who the fuck is this guy? It's Mack McClung. He's a legend.

The 2023 Dunk Contest was widely praised as the best in years specifically because of McClung.

More from Bert Kreischer

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Void
Bert KreischerBert Kreischer

Tom Segura is on steroids

Tom Segura's on steroids. Yeah. Tom. Yeah. I can't believe people don't know that. No, no, no. He's been 270 pounds his whole life. And then last year he found 'discipline.' Sure, sure. Was it No, you don't think it's the proximity of him and Joe Rogan maybe happened the same fucking needles.

Tom Segura has attributed his transformation to diet and hard work; Bert's claim is likely comedic exaggeration and remains unverified.
Void
Bert KreischerBert Kreischer

Aaron Rodgers is 'heavy with secrets' and one of my favorite people to hang out with.

Aaron Rodgers is one of my one of my favorite hangs. Cuz that guy's heavy with secrets. Oh yeah. Oh, I had, he, we did secret time on the bus to the point where I was like, yo, cameras are on, bro. Like, someone turned the fucking cameras off. He was awesome.

Personal opinion of a guest's character and social habits.
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Bert KreischerBert Kreischer

I will die at 77 in a shocking accident like a shark attack or saving kids

If I can make it to 77, I think I'll make it to 77 clean. And I think I'm gonna go like from like a shark attack or something really... I want to get like attacked by an animal or like a plane crash would be nice... I want my death to be shocking... Saving some kids. That's what I want. Hero. That's how I wanna die.

Bert is currently alive; this won't resolve for decades.

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