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Void
Uncle ChapsUncle Chaps

69 is a seventh-date move

69 is a seven date move also... Seventh date. Let's do a 69. But it's going to be 69 with a caveat that she's on top because she's not ready for my butthole by eight.

OpinionLifeHotSubjectiveSarcastic
Inherently subjective dating 'rules'.

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Push
Sep 11, 2019
#25905
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Raiders were on a mission and would have beaten any team on Monday night after the Antonio Brown drama

The Raiders weren't going to lose last night. It could have been anybody. It could have been the 85 Bears out there... The Raiders were going to be on a mission from the get-go. They spent the entire week hearing about Antonio Brown, hearing about how they were going to suck, how they had no hope... Anytime that happens, especially before a Monday night game, the team's going to be motivated to play a little bit extra hard. That was a team that was going to beat anybody.

The Raiders did beat the Broncos 24-16 in that game, but finished the season 7-9 and didn't sustain that 'beat anyone' energy.
Win
Sep 11, 2019
#10033
Big CatBig Cat

Joe Flacco shouldn't be a starting quarterback in the NFL anymore

Joe Flacco stinks. He's bad. He shouldn't be a starting quarterback in the NFL anymore. John Elway likes him because he's tall and he throws... He still throws a nice looking ball, but it's just nothing else is good.

Flacco was benched mid-season in 2019 for Drew Lock and eventually moved into a career backup role, proving he was no longer a viable franchise starter.
Void
Sep 11, 2019
#25906
Big CatBig Cat

Vic Fangio's decision to kick a field goal down 21-6 with 10 minutes left was a loser's move

When [Vic Fangio] kicked that field goal down 21-6 with 10 minutes left in the fourth quarter, you need two touchdowns no matter what. He kicked a field goal to then need two touchdowns no matter what... why are you so afraid of not getting a fourth down when kicking a field goal is essentially admitting defeat there?

Subjective football strategy, though most modern analytics would agree with Big Cat that kicking there significantly lowers win probability.

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Loss
Uncle ChapsUncle Chaps

Trevor Lawrence will win NFL MVP and the Jaguars have the league's best skill positions

I'm gonna put a lot of money on [Trevor Lawrence] winning the MVP. 'cause the odds have gotta be insane. And he's so good. And now having Calvin Ridley... I don't know if you've seen the clips from their camp. Calvin Ridley's a freak. The Jags might have across the board the best skill positions.

Lamar Jackson won the 2023 MVP. Trevor Lawrence and the Jaguars struggled down the stretch, missing the playoffs entirely, and Lawrence was not in the MVP conversation.
Push
Uncle ChapsUncle Chaps

Trevor Lawrence sucks at throwing the deep ball

I don't think [Trevor Lawrence] sucks, but he definitely sucks throwing the deep ball, which makes him suck. And they don't really have anybody to catch it either... some of the throws that he's made when people are wide open... he just can't make 'em.

Lawrence's deep-ball accuracy remained a statistical point of contention throughout 2022, though he improved significantly in the second half of the season.
Loss
Uncle ChapsUncle Chaps

I will get both my big toenails removed if Trevor Lawrence doesn't reach an AFC Championship on his rookie contract

I'm so confident that Trevor Lawrence isn't a bust. If they don't make the AFC Championship on his rookie contract, I will get... five years... I will come up wherever we're recording. I will go [get] both of my big toenails removed.

Trevor Lawrence's rookie contract ran through the 2025 season (5th year option). The Jaguars never reached the AFC Championship during that span (2021-2025). In 2025 they went 13-4 but lost in the Wild Card to the Bills 27-24. Uncle Chaps owes his big toenails.

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