DC Defenders fans will break the world record for the longest cup snake at Audi Field this weekend

I'm challenging DC Defenders fans to get a cup snake that goes around the entire Stadium... they can break the world record which as most as I can tell is a hundred yards... it's going to happen. We're going to get the cup snake going around.

Coach K is entering his 'senile' phase where he has no filter and is constantly angry at the media

I think we're going to get into very soon, if we're not there already like the ornery like super angry at the media, just mad all the time [Coach K senile]. We're entering... the Twilight phase of Coach K having no filter and finally saying shit that he really is wanted to say for a very long time.

I refuse to consider the possibility of Tom Brady leaving the Patriots until it actually happens

I don't want to think about living in a world where Tom Brady isn't on the Patriots. I'm not going to consider it a possibility until it becomes a reality. So that is my official stance.

Arizona is the best team in the country

Arizona just showing that they are probably the best team in the country because they absolutely whooped Arkansas.

Ben McCollum will never leave the Iowa Hawkeyes for another job

I don't think he's going anywhere. He's from Iowa City. He's coached for 15 years in division two... gets his dream job at Iowa. I don't think he's going anywhere.

Jay Bilis is being disingenuous with his criticism of the transfer portal

Jay Bilis is being disingenuous... what I don't understand about Jay Bilis is like, so what if people complain about the transfer portal and the NIL... this is a tweet from 20 years ago. Everyone's saying Will Wade's a dickhead.