Mike Budenholzer should be fired on the spot

The quotes that Budenholzer had after they lost game three... I actually think he should be fired on the spot. He was saying that Giannis and Middleton, they're playing 33 to 36 minutes of game, and that's about their ceiling in the playoffs. He's saying about his MVP, right, 36? ... basically admitting his incompetence to the whole world.

I'm rooting for Mitch Trubisky because 2020 needs a cool story

It's bullshit that anyone is sitting here and rooting against Mitch Trubisky. ... 2020 sucks, root for something crazy. Mitch Trubisky 2020. ... I'm ready and I have a little perspective for you from coach Matt Nagy... we're going to all support around him and give him every opportunity to have a very happy ending.

A Nathan Peterman implosion is a peak football viewing experience

I remember where I was when Nathan Peterman imploded, right? And that's all you can hope for out of a football game.

I lied about destroying Vanny Woodhead; I have been keeping it for years

Technically it's destroyed. Legally it's chopped up. But I kind of... I didn't have the heart to chop it up, so I just been keeping it... I was like, every time it was an excuse I used to not follow through with chopping it up.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes

Come on, Zach Wilson, his ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes. That's a fact. If he plays to the best of his ability.

Al-Qaeda is the only one who could have written the Monday Night Football script

Running out with the flag... hard knocks... there was so much hope and hype. And, you know, talking about the NFL script, the only one who could have written that script is Al-Qaeda.