Andrew Luck is never actually going to throw an NFL football again

Andrew Luck is proving our theory of that arrow paradox, the Schrodinger's arrow. He's never going to actually throw a football. He's just getting incrementally closer and closer and closer to throwing NFL football.

The XFL should brand itself as the league for quarterbacks with small hands

The XFL should brand itself as the football league for all the guys who have too small hands... XFL Super Bowl champion Alex Smith. XFL Super Bowl champion Jameis Winston.

LeBron James will not sign with the Houston Rockets because he hates the city

Houston is my hot seat because the word on the street from, directly from LeBron James' lips. During the season when they were in Houston, he hates Houston as a city... The strip malls? The congestion? When you pull up Google Maps and it's just a ring of red... I believe that he hates Houston. I'm taking them off. We're officially taking them off the Pardon My Take big board for LeBron.

The 4-1 loss to Belgium was the worst USMNT performance in years

That was the worst performance from the US that I've seen in years. Just completely lackluster from the start. So much blame to go around. Tim Ream, friend of the program, good guy over the hill, turned into soccer Shawn Bradley before our very eyes got dunked on twice.

Christian Pulisic was a 'no-show' and looked like he didn't care against Belgium

Christian Pulisic, the long anointed Captain America future face of this league for American soccer. Absolute no show of a game, I would say worse than a no show of a game. And then he checks himself out. Just looks lackluster, looks like he doesn't care at all. Had the most turnovers on the field of anybody. That played just really, really, really bad.

The US will never close the skill gap compared to the rest of the world in soccer

People will never close the skill gap. USA will never close the skill gap compared to the rest of the world in soccer.