I was 100% confident the Capitals would beat the Penguins once game six went to overtime

I knew it was going to happen. We all knew it was going to happen. I was so confident in that team when it went to overtime. If we had lost that game, the whole series was over. There's no chance that we're going to come back. That's a mental midget thing.

I might eat poop just to 'alpha' PFT because his hesitation is getting sad

I've even said to you, I might just eat poop just to alpha you because it's getting so sad what you're doing. You are like, I can't do it. I can't do it. You came off the plane. You're like, what if I eat a mushroom with a little poop on it?

Zach Miller's gruesome non-catch against the Saints was definitely a touchdown

It was a touchdown. Yes, it was a touchdown... and almost lost his leg for a non-touchdown. It was crazy.

England will beat the Netherlands and then lose a heartbreaking match to Argentina

I think England's gonna win this weekend. And then you'll have the realization that it might not actually be coming home after all... losing to Argentina at that stage, that would be the most heartbreaking loss they could possibly have.

Christian Pulisic is clearly not and cannot be the face of US soccer

I'm just sick of relying on him [Pulisic] to be the face of US soccer because it can't be, it's so clear that he's not.

The 4-1 loss to Belgium was the worst USMNT performance in years

That was the worst performance from the US that I've seen in years. Just completely lackluster from the start. So much blame to go around. Tim Ream, friend of the program, good guy over the hill, turned into soccer Shawn Bradley before our very eyes got dunked on twice.