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Loss
Jan 24, 2020·Picks
#4145
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I am a better kicker than the kickers at Alabama

Alabama could do a lot worse. Dude, I'm a better kicker than Alabama. Saban would have another chip if he had you as a kicker. That's a fact.

Alabama had significant kicking struggles around this time, but PFT is not a D1-caliber athlete.

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Loss
Jan 24, 2020
#25302
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Enron is due for a massive comeback

A little investment tip, Enron. It's bound to bounce back. It has to. It is due.

Enron filed for bankruptcy in 2001 and its stock is worthless; it is not bouncing back.
Loss
Jan 24, 2020
#4138
Big CatBig Cat

Zion Williamson is a bonafide bust

Zion is a bust. Parentheses: I went to sleep at halftime.

Zion had an incredible second half in his debut and became an All-Star, proving this satirical take incorrect.
Win
Jan 24, 2020
#4139
Big CatBig Cat

Zion Williamson is always one bad weekend away from being fat

He is not fat, but he's always a bad weekend away from being fat. A bachelor party, going on a trip. Maybe a trip to New Orleans... you come into work on Monday and everyone looks at you like you got stung by a bunch of bees.

Weight and conditioning became recurring issues throughout Zion's early career, often sidelined by injury.

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Void
Sep 16, 2026
#31413
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chiefs' window never closed

I don't think we ever actually closed the Chiefs' window. I think Mahomes was just in bed because he was injured, far away from the window.

The Chiefs' long-term contention status is ultimately subjective, though their dynasty remained active at the time of the episode.
Open
Sep 16, 2026
#31426
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Mahomes will be back to himself by season's end

By the end of this season, Mahomes is gonna be back to being Mahomes.

Whether Mahomes returned to his established level by the end of the 2026 NFL season had not yet been resolved.
Open
Sep 16, 2026
#31414
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Oregon loss could turn Dan Lanning into a psychopath

I don't think that Dan Lanning has slept since that loss. I think Dan Lanning has turned into an absolute psycho because of this loss. He's sick. It actually might be a dangerous thing for the rest of the Big Ten that Oregon lost that game.

Whether the loss made Oregon more dangerous over the rest of the season is a future, testable team-performance claim.