I'm officially retiring from writing books for at least the next 25 years

We promise we won't write another book till at least 20 years. And probably, I'm actually gonna say 25 years. I think I'm gonna retire from writing books.

Shohei Ohtani's home runs in Colorado don't count because they are just pop flies anywhere else

I know Shohei [Ohtani] hit two home runs, but he was doing it in Colorado and we could fucking do that. That's a pop fly. That's a fucking pop fly. I could hit a home run in Colorado.

The Nationals' offense is having a great year because facing their own Little League pitching staff in spring training gave them confidence.

That's why the Nats offense is so good this year because their pitching staff is pretty much like a little league team. So like in spring training, they just all got really confident. They're like, yeah, we can all hit.

The wild-card round should be one game

The three-game wild-card series sucks. You shouldn't call it a series. There's no feel for it. I think that's probably the best way to do it.

Jayden Daniels should not play with an unstable elbow

He should not be playing in this game. Not just because of the elbow, which will pop out because he is obviously saying he wants to keep playing as he should. The elbow might pop out for a fourth time. It's definitely not stable.

The 49ers are the best team in football

I think the 49ers right now are playing like the 49ers are the best team in football. I would put them above the Bills right now.