The Bengals bringing back Marvin Lewis is a strategy to maintain relevancy through being a running joke.

The Bengals... Bringing Marvin Lewis back and continuing his contract and continuing him coaching, it's almost like a running joke they've created themselves that gives them relevancy where everyone can be like, Marvin Lewis jokes. So you at least have an identity that everyone can make fun of Marvin Lewis.

The worst thing you can do at an office job is have people set high expectations for you.

You don't want to be great at your job. You don't want to be really, really bad at your job. You just kind of want to just go with the speed of traffic... That is the worst thing that you can do to yourself is make people have high expectations. It's a low bar in Cincinnati. I love it.

Bruce Arians will be back to coaching within two months of his retirement.

Bruce Arians, he's retired. But as we know, he's not going to know what to do with himself. He's just going to sit on his porch staring out into infinity for two months, and he'll think that's retirement, and then he'll be like, I've got to get back to coaching.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.