The Cavaliers became a much better team by getting younger and more athletic at the trade deadline

LeBron actually made his team better... He got younger, more athletic. They stopped doing the whole, like, let's just get these veterans on the league minimum to come and all my friends will come and hang out and we'll try to beat the Warriors. Not going to work. So they got younger, better.

The Cavaliers' trade deadline moves make LeBron James more likely to leave Cleveland in free agency

The way that [LeBron James] structured these trades actually made it seem like he's, in my opinion, more likely to go. I don't think that he's going to stick around Cleveland. I think that's pretty obvious.

LeBron James forced the Dwyane Wade trade because he is obsessed with 'eating ass'

LeBron James is obsessed with getting his butthole eaten, and that's why he got Dwayne Wade out. [LeBron] wanted to get Dwayne Wade the fuck out of Cleveland because he knows Dwayne Wade's an alpha because he gets his butthole eaten and LeBron doesn't.

The Detroit Pistons are moving in the right direction despite their Game 7 loss

The progression of the Pistons along the way is like, what were they, two years ago? They won like 16 or 18 games. They were so bad. Last year they had competitive series against The Knicks. Then this year, the natural progression from that is, let's take the regular season super seriously. Let's win all the games that we can get a high seed... I would say the totality of this season, we're still going the right direction in Detroit.

I will renounce my American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup

I will renounce American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup this year... I'll probably need somebody to come and hang out with me and... the south of France is nice.

Patrick Reed is the first PAWG in the history of professional golf.

Patrick Reed, let me tell you, I think he might be the first PAWG golfer. He is. He's thick as hell. Like he was filling out. He also wears... the tight pants... he looks like early era Meghan Trainor... He bends over. He's like, ooh.