The Rams would win a trade sending Matthew Stafford to the Vikings for Sam Darnold

There were floating rumors out there about Matthew Stafford being traded for Sam Darnold. Which would've been insane if that had happened. I was, as a fan of chaos, I was hoping that that would happen before the game because that we'll never see that again. And honestly, I think that the Rams would win that trade.

The Barstool office will eat over 1,000 Uncrustables in a single week

I predict we're gonna be in the like thousand ranges. ... I will make sure that we do not run out of Uncrustables at all for the week. And we'll keep track. Yeah. For this office. I'll send out an email. I'll be like, it's my, I I'm, we're doing a study. Eat as many Uncrustables as you want.

You can actually lose weight by eating a diet of Uncrustables

I actually think you could lose weight eating Uncrustables. Peanut butter's got tons of protein in it. Bread is the biggest part of the food pyramid, which is really, really healthy and scientific.

JMU may not win again until the dog-poop bettor returns

JMU probably won't win another football game until that guy logs back on.

The Wizards are a one-through-eight seed team

I feel confident in my one through eight seed. Love that for the Wiz.

The Falcons can expose the 49ers defense

They might not actually be as good as we think they are on defense. I don't hate the Falcons at all in this game.